Chocolate Bits, Sunbeams and Laughter

Body Politic

2012-01-03T15:12:00.000-08:00

Scene : The TV is tuned to the Lokpal Debate raging furiously in the Lok Sabha.

Bunnu: That speaker maami* is not good
(*speaker Meira Kumar)
Me: Why ?
Bunnu: She is talking to the people in the room about their bodies
Me: What ?!
Bunnu: Because she keeps on saying The Nose Habit or the Eyes Habit

Comprehension dawns.....
The Nose Habit => The Nos Have It
The Eyes Habit => The Ayes Have It

Rollercoaster

2011-12-12T21:59:00.000-08:00

Caught in circumstances unforeseen
Long the months have been
Numbness and pain
Alternating like the sun and rain

Grudgingly trudging every step
Gritting, wincing, stifling many a yelp
The forced cheer flickers and the mood dips
The smile falters and composure trips

But a stubborn voice, internal
Whispers fiercely, piercing the darkness so abysmal
The shadow play of ups and downs might be infernal
Yet this too shall pass….Hope springs eternal

Face the music

2011-08-09T09:29:00.000-07:00

Bunnu: Violence is bad, right Amma ?
Me: Yes. Why ?
Bunnu: In school, I heard a violence song. It was in Hindi. My teacher played it on CD
Me: What ?!
Bunnu: Here, let me sing it for you
(hollers at ear-drum-shattering pitch)
Sheela Kills Bavani ... Sheela Kills Bavaaaani !

Wondering if I should:
1) Let the status quo be - better than the actual lyrics
2) Provide him with the correct lyrics - which would immediately be followed by translation requests
3) Attempt a Master Dinanath-esque Ahimsa dialogue

L.Balaji = Chetan Sharma Ka Chachera Bhai

2011-05-22T11:26:00.000-07:00

Hands hurt (thanks for the nice comments folks - much needed boost !)

BUT STILL .....

Some things have to be written about

The scorecard for the final over of the MI Innings read : 4-4-4-4-1-6

Take a bow Franklin and Rayudu !!

Irony of ironies - KKR meets MI again in the next game, and at Wankhede !!

Is there light at the end of the Carpal tunnel ?

2011-05-15T21:01:00.000-07:00

Let me know .....

Typing every character costs - so restricted to work-related typing only

Unable to read blogs, write posts or comment on anyone's posts

The Waiting

2011-04-09T20:13:00.000-07:00

In a blur, time flies fast
The present merging swiftly with the past
Temporal raindrops, standing no chance
Steamed away by the heat of circumstance
Actions calm and deliberate, chaos in disguise
The smiles frequent, never reaching the eyes
Hard-fought battles, optimism the cost
Yet always unclear as to who won and who lost
The mind dithers between sauntering forth and recoiling in terror
The vultures circle, salivating for one error
The heart grows dull, the soul goes stale
Waiting..........waiting to exhale

It's a bird, it's a plane, No .........

2011-04-02T13:33:00.000-07:00

It's me, soaring above the Stratosphere !!

Sri Lankan Innings:
Throat gone hoarse due to non-stop screaming - One
Ears blissfully listening to the crowd go wild during the initial two hours - Two
Number of cushions pummelled to limpness by the 50-over mark- Three
"Yahoos" yodeled during ZaK's initial spell - Four
The abuses/minute rate for every Sreesanth over - Five
Guffaws before the 45th over of the Sri Lankan batting - Six
"Devudaaa" moments during overs 48-50 of the Lankan batting power play - Seven
Fingernails totally bitten off by the 50th over - Eight
Curses yelled at ZaK for giving away 18 runs in the last over - Nine
Fervent prayers to make Ravi Shastri magically stop talking during the break - Ten

Indian Innings:
Number of centuries predicted for the Indian innings - One
Eyes wide open in shock on seeing Viru dismissed LBW by Malinga - Two
Minutes spent on the phone commiserating with the sibling with India reeling at 31 for 2 - Three
The ratio of "mental time" to real time during each over of Muralidharan - Four to one
Shivers of apprehension every time a Gambhir/Kohli stroke unerringly reached a fielder - Five
Seconds of stunned disbelief on seeing Dilshan take out Kohli with a brilliant CnB - Six
Hand slams to the head on seeing MSD walk out at number five instead of Yuvi - Seven
Number of breaths held during each over of Malinga's final spell - Eight
"Porumai Daa, Ninnu Aadungada*" mumbled each time there was a chance of a run out - Nine
Buckets of tears shed on watching Dhoni loft Perera for a massive six to seal the deal - Ten

Each aspect of watching the final game - eminently quantifiable

Watching MSD hit 91 to win the man of the match, and seeing the Boys in Blue hold the cup aloft - Utterly, butterly, immensely immeasurable !!

*Tamizh for "Please be patient and bat steadily"

I believe I can fly

2011-03-30T10:54:00.000-07:00

I apologize Dear Dhoni
For all the times I called you a phony

Bhajji, you were a revelation
Your nerves of steel a true inspiration

Nehra, man of honour, all sins forgiven
Your ethics in not appealing for the slight-bounce catch, truly amazin'
The way you cleverly varied the line
Showed your class, come rain or shine

Boys in blue
Our wishes came true
In the minds of your fans, ton after ton
The World Cup is already won

Side-splitting dialogue

2011-03-28T23:41:00.000-07:00

Dr.Jekyll:

Arz Kiya Hai

Kehne Ko Hai Yeh Jashn-e-Mohali
Phir Bhi Dil Kyun Hai Khaali Khaali
Saath Ho Gharwali Ya Ho Baaharwali
Jo Hum Haare Denge Sab Gaali

Mr.Hyde:

Tu Bole Gambhir Ne Zaroor Paise Khaye
Main Boloon Yuvraj Run-Out Se Bach Gaya
Tu Bole Afridi Sabko Roz Badnaam Kare
Main Boloon Buddha Satak Gaya
Jaane Tu Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na
Maane Tu Maane Tu Ya Maane Na

Dr.Jekyll: Oye ! Save the rhyme-shyme for another time !! This is a serious conversation !! We stand no chance at Mohali !! Even if we somehow make it through to the Finals, Sangakkara and Co will make Sinhalese Stew out of this bunch !

Mr.Hyde: Ye of little faith !! You said something similar when Imran smirked at us contemptuously after taking 6/14 and bowling us out for 125 at Sharjah. Look what happened then !! The conditions, the pitch, the unbelievable victory for us when we bowled them out for 87 !!

Dr.Jekyll: Hmph ! Miandad making the last-ball-full-toss the unshakeable albatross around Chetan Sharma's neck more than compensated for such rare wins !

Mr.Hyde: This time the opposition is weak !! Afridi and Shoaib Akhtar look older than Nirupa Roy in 1970s tearjerkers ! Who do they have to wreak havoc with bat or ball ?

Dr.Jekyll: You duffer !! They do not need anyone on their side to do well. We are there no ? To crumble under the pressure of expectations, the collective burden of ignominies past, to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory !

Mr.Hyde: This is not your grandfather's Indian side !! This is the zen-gen !! The current openers could probably eat Waqar-yorkers for breakfast !! Plus Sachin will definitely score a century in Mohali !!

Dr.Jekyll: Do you not remember the Bangalore test from 1987 ? Gavskar's last match as a player - where he got out for 96 in the second innings, we lost the match and the series 1-0 !! Sachin too shall face the same fate !

Mr.Hyde: But we have done decently well in the initial games. So what if we got dismissed under 50 overs multiple times or our fielding has been sub-par ? The middle-order has been dependable for pinch-hitting and even newbies like Ashwin and Raina have done well

Dr.Jekyll: Middle order ? We are characterized by middling-frontline-disorder !! Sehwag is somewhat injured, Kohli is too impulsive to play a game-changing innings, and Gambhir ... well, he plays by the book(ies) !

Mr.Hyde: You just wait !! We will win the toss, bat first, score 275 plus (with Sachin getting a ton), and our spinners will do their magic and bowl them out for under-200 !

Dr.Jekyll: What spin magic ? They will make Bhajias out of Bhajji during the power play !! Ashwin will have a breakdown and we will have to again scramble unsuccessfully for the elusive fifth strike bowler !!

Mr.Hyde: We can always sneak in Sreesanth into the stands and make him discreetly bash up the remaining batsmen !! Or replace the third umpire with Mandira Bedi !!

Dr.Jekyll: But, but .. that would be totally unfair !!

Mr.Hyde: All's fair in love and war !! This is Meri Jung, Teri Jung, the grandmother of Erica Jung !!

Jo Jeeta Woh Sikandar, Jo Haara Woh Bandar !!

Congratulations !!

2011-02-25T21:49:00.000-08:00

To the woman, deservedly wearing the bright red graduation Cap and Gown today as she was being awarded the Ph.D degree in Mathematics

A bright smile, the only visible indicator of her incredible achievement -a glorious example of the perseverance of the human spirit. The vindicating stamp of success on having reached the summit after being on an uphill climb of increasing difficulty for four decades due to the game of circumstances called life

With one daughter and two granddaughters, braving logistical challenges, present right in the convocation hall, cheering her on in her moment of triumph

And another daughter and grandson watching the Webcast live and yelling "Congratulations" over the phone

Amma - you are amazing, awe-inspiring, astounding !! We are privileged to be your daughters !!

Then and Now

2011-02-17T22:23:00.000-08:00

Then:

The exchanges flowed freely, a cheery gush
Words tumbled out in a frantic rush
The conversations warm and welcome, eagerly awaited
A game of verbal thrust and parry, to delight and be delighted
The connection instantaneous, forged out of mutual kinship
The easy laughter echoing the sweet melody of Friendship
Bonds to strengthen, new facets to discover
The heart merrily dancing with dreams of forever

The head complacently wondered occasionally
How horrific it must be, how utterly lonely
For those who suffer the agonizing fate
Of being denied the joy of a true soul mate

Now:

The carefully measured words, an illusion of normalcy
Compound the feeling of loss, sinking further into despondency
Thoughts jumbled, unable to fathom what went wrong
The heart restless, searching in vain for a lost song
The increasingly rare moments of spontaneity clearly make one see
The crumbling, shadowy remnants of how things used to be
Attempts to rekindle the magic, to reach resonance in spirit and tone
Only accentuate the discordant notes of a souring relationship, once set in stone

No longer smug as before
The head wonders once more
Lucky are those who stand alone, who never have to pay the cost
To be banished for eternity, haunted by visions of Paradise Lost

Victim of Love - Anatomy of a Romance

2011-02-14T22:43:00.000-08:00

Stage 1 - Can You Feel The Love Tonight

The summer of 1983 - a time of innocence, the awareness gradual, heady and enchanting, mostly courtesy snatches of overheard conversations ........

"17/5, No chance at all. Transistor Off, Or I am going to break it !" ...."Zimbabwe was nothing ! Kapil somehow managed to salvage his Captain status with his 175 kock. England is no Zimbabwe and this is the Semi Final. Botham & Willis will send these guys packing in 20 overs itself !."......"So what if the Windies allowed themselves to lose a league match ? Because of Srikkanth's 38 we managed 183. You listen to this commentary and torture yourself, I am going to sleep .......Wake up ! Wake up ! Kapil caught Richards ! Amarnath-kku 3 wickets !! West Indies All out !! We Won !!

Celebrations all around, every blessed sports page in every available newspaper read over and over again. Editions of Sportstar and Sportworld bought and treasured. The toothy grin of Kapil Dev and his merry men as they held aloft the Prudential Cup etched into the mind forever. Every India match, Ranji Trophy games, Duleep Trophy contests savoured with care, trusty Philips pocket transistor accompanying me everywhere. The heady rush of being in love !!

Stage 2 - Love, Love Me Do

1985, Benson & Hedges. The floodlights, stumpvision cameras, Channel 9 soundbytes courtesy Chappel and Benaud, the multicoloured team outfits. High on optimism, braving the time difference and yawning away at school as a consequence. Confidence blossoming as we won all the League matches and faced a non-threatening New Zealand team in the Semis. Vengaaya Sarkar's knock and his surprisingly nimble running between the wickets in his partnership with Kapil ensured a smooth win. The prospect of facing the neighbouring arch-rivals in the Final set hearts thumping and sent the head into a tizzy. A rocky start to the Pak innings hampered their scoring severely which was in complete contrast to the game-changing Opening partnership between Shastri and Srikkanth. With this victory, it was the winter of content. Only regret - Srikkanth being denied the Champion of Champions trophy.

Stage 3 - Nothing Lasts Forever, Even Cold November Rain

April 1986. Firecrackers ready in anticipation, sweets made in advance. Alas, it was not meant to be. The first among many horrific instances of "snatching defeat from the jaws of victory". The loud thud heard all over was not the sound of he-who-must-not-be-named's bat connecting with the Great-Grandmother-of-all-mistimed-full-tosses, but the sound of a million Indian hearts crashing to the ground in agonized disbelief.

October 1987. Reigning champions, home turf advantage. Fans were ready to forgive and forget the disasters of the past. Despite a scrappy showing in the league matches, we made it to the Semi Finals, playing England once more. The mood was one of revenge, with the possibility of an Indo-Pak final. But the old colonists were our undoing, with Gooch sweeping us off to reach the Final. Border's brash bunch had the last laugh though, as the Aussies won the Cup

March 1992. We lost badly, did not even make it to the Semis. Worse - they won !! Can it be 1996 already, please !!!

Stage 4 - Baby Just One More Chance

March 1996: Never mind the wind chill ! It is the quarter finals and we are playing against Pakistan ! Two hundred Indian graduate students and five Pak graduate students crowded into a tiny auditorium, heaters and tempers flaring to life as comforters and obscenities are generously flung about. Will 287 be good enough ? The break between the two innings seems to stretch to infinity, the crowd restless, the mood explosive. Aamir Sohail grating on the nerves like fingernails on a chalkboard, Miandad looking on with contempt as the scorecard ticked upwards. A sickeningly familiar feeling fills the pit of the stomach as folks begin to leave despondently. But, life has its moments, Miandad run out in his last match. We win !! Everyone jumps in the snow outside, screaming like maniacs, bubbling over with joy - advisors, funding worries and deadlines forgotten. So what if we didn't win ? We beat them, that is all that matters !!

Stage 5: What becomes of the broken hearted ?

1999 - Hosted in England again. Same story as the last time. Reach the knockout stage, beat the Pakis, Lose eventually. The recklessness of youth giving way to the cynicism gained in the school of hard knocks.

Kapil crying on TV ?? That's it, I am outta here !! 2003, 2007 - Ho hum, blah blah, whatever........ I am really out of here !!

Stage 6: An Eternal Flame

Yeh 20/20 Kya Hai, Yeh 20/20 ?? There's someone named Dhoni who made us win in South Africa, against Pakistan, in a thrilling Final ?? Time to rekindle forgotten passions. Ooh La La, our very own Premier League, take that English County Cricket !! Goodbye Glamorgan, Helloooooo CSK, DD, RCB and Co !!

2011 - Time for a new World Cup. A new World Order. Time to bite the bullet and get Dish Network. Time to experience the highs and the lows, the ebb and the flow, the shattering sadness and the giddy happiness. In short, time to start living again !!

Save the last dance !! Play it again Sam !! Am a fool in love !!

Tamizh Film Dialogues Quiz 6 - The Answers

2011-02-13T22:37:00.000-08:00

Many thanks to everyone who participated in the latest Tamizh film dialogues quiz

Multiple people got half or more questions right. The winner: rrmom with a score of 8/10.

Here are the answers :

1. Appo Saadha Kaakka Onga Grandfather-a ? Andankaakka Onga Great Grandfather-a ?

Saamy: Vikram's crusading cop cleanses Tirunelveli of all ills in this Masala-fest helmed by Hari. Vivek plays a semi-agnostic Brahmin priest out to reform the prejudiced views of his brethren. He flings this salvo at his Father-in-law when his FIL claims that crows are the ancestral kin of Brahmins while attempting to find some crows to eat the daily offerings of rice to the dear departed

2. Kazhuthukku Thaaliya Pathi Naan Kanavu Kandava Illa. Kaal Salangaiya Pathiye Eppavum Sindhichava

Azhagan: Three determined damsels (Bhanupriya the dancer, Geetha the teacher and Madhoo the child-woman nanny) woo a noble widower (Mammootty) who runs a hotel during the day and serenades the aforementioned dancer with full-fledged classical-Raaga songs over the phone by night. This line is agitatedly spoken by Bhanupriya to Mammootty as she tries and fails to deny her feelings for him.

3. Kanna, Sila Per Solli Thirundhuvaanga, Sila Per Anubavappattu Thirundhuvaanga. Sila Per Odhachaathaan Thirundhuvaanga

Arunachalam: A Rajini- conquers-all-evil blockbuster with the mandatory Punch dialogue. Thalaivar issues this warning to a bunch of baddies (Raguvaran, V.K.Ramaswamy et al) before making good on his words and cementing his hand-of-God status

4. Anjadi Ombodhangulam Oyaram. Weight Aruvathanju Kilo. Colour Karuppukkum Sevappukkum Naduvula. Indha Maari Irukkara Enna Maari Azhagaana Aala Paathu Neenga Love Pannakoodadhu ? Clue: Breathless

Keladi Kanmani: The clue refers to the "Mannil Indha Kaadhal" song which SPB sang (supposedly) in one breath. This film features a role reversal of the typical Kollywood romance - with the daughter playing spoilsport to her widower Dad's (SPB) budding romance with her tutor (Radhika). This line is spoken by Janakaraj (a friend of SPB's) to Radhika as a not-too-subtle hint of his feelings for her, who is subsequently dejected at her choosing SPB over him

5. Enyya ? Kaila Oru Mike-u, Satellite TV Irukkunnu, Oru Coat-a Mattittu Neenga Enna Venna Keppinga. Adhukkallam Naan Badhil Sollanuma ?

Mudhalvan: Shankar's return to form after the disastrous Jeans, featuring the reliable Arjun as the honest TV-Anchor protagonist Pugazhendhi who exposes the misdeeds of the wicked and corrupt Chief Minister (Raghuvaran) and dons the mantle of CM to much applause, aggression and assault. This line is spoken by a furious Raghuvaran during a live Television interview with anchor Arjun as he attempts some form of damage-control on seeing Arjun unleash a series of Raghuvaran's caught-on-tape mistakes in front of a massive audience

6. Eppadiyum Tharkolai Dhaan Senjukkuvennu Neenga Adampudicheenganna Adapathi Enakku Kavalai Illa. Ennaa, Abalai Penngala Thedi Kandupidichu Avangala Kaapaatharadhu Ennodaya Thozhil Illa.

Punnagai Mannan: A tale of multiple sets of doomed cliff-jump-happy lovers with Kamal being a victim always, in this typical K.Balachander directed how-dare-you-expect-a-happy-conclusion movie. Kamal taunts Revathi with this line as he catches her attempting to jump off a cliff due to a poor showing in the academics department.

7. Ende Kaadhali Ungalukku Manaivi Aayittu Varum. Aanal Ungal Manaivi Enikki Kaadhali Aaittu Varaadhu

Andha Ezhu Naatkal: Bhagyaraj plays "Paalakkaattu Maadhavan" who loses his girl to another (Rajesh), but proves to be the better man in the end. He emotionally utters this line in a faux-Palakkaad accent (no MMKR-style Kameshwaran this !) during the climactic "Nekka ? Nokka ?" tug-of-war between him and the dumbstruck husband while poor viewers are rendered temporarily deaf due to the high-pitched screams of the hysterical Thaali-clutching lady in question (Ambika)

8. Nee Engitterundhu Oru Kodi Rooba Eduthittu Pove, Thiruppi Sambaadhichiralaam. En?, Oru Patthu Kilo Thangatha Eduthuttu Pove, Thiruppi Vaangidalaam. Aana, En Chellatha Eduthittu Pona, Eppadi Da ?

Ghilli: Vijay's scene-by-scene, dialogue-by-dialogue remake of the Telugu smash-hit Okkadu, with a modified climax (which rendered the heroine's characterization to be even weaker than the original) courtesy director Dharani. Prakash Raj reprises his role as the antagonist in the Tamizh version as well with the famous "Chellam I Love You Da" line to his object of affection (Trisha, as wooden as an Oak). He emphasizes the enormity of Vijay's blunder (for saving Trisha as she attempts to run away from Prakashraj) with this dialogue

9. Gouravathula Nee Ettadi Paanja, Ongappan Padhinaaradi Paaivaanda. Clue: Jaadhigal Illayadi Paappa

Vedam Pudidhu: Bharatiraja's hard-hitting film, with Satyaraj in a landmark role as the fair-minded Balu Thevar, who sacrifices all to save the innocent offspring of a priest (Charuhasan) as castiest tensions rise in this village-themed dramedy. He speaks this line to his honest son who wantonly implicates himself in the theft of a temple idol to save the honour of his Brahmin lover (Amala)

10. Padi Thaandinaa Pathini Illangaradhu Pazhaya Kadhai. Padi Thaandinaalum Pathini, Pathinidhaan

Pudhumai Penn: Revathi's fiery avatar as she proves that hell-hath-no-fury-as-a-woman-falsely-accused. She smolderingly lashes at her accusatory husband (Pandian) with this retort as she walks out with her head held high from the stiflingly suspicion-filled atmosphere of his house

Tamizh Film Dialogues Quiz 6

2011-02-07T14:50:00.000-08:00

Guess the Tamizh films (actors, situations would be a bonus) based on the following dialogues.

Note 1: Comment moderation is enabled. Answers and all responses will be published on Monday, Feb 14th 2011

Note 2: Clues have been given for #4 and #9 - since no one has got these yet

Appo Saadha Kaakka Onga Grandfather-a ? Andankaakka Onga Great Grandfather-a ?
Kazhuthukku Thaaliya Pathi Naan Kanavu Kandava Illa. Kaal Salangaiya Pathiye Eppavum Sindhichava
Kanna, Sila Per Solli Thirundhuvaanga, Sila Per Anubavappattu Thirundhuvaanga. Sila Per Odhachaathaan Thirundhuvaanga
Anjadi Ombodhangulam Oyaram. Weight Aruvathanju Kilo. Colour Karuppukkum Sevappukkum Naduvula. Indha Maari Irukkara Enna Maari Azhagaana Aala Paathu Neenga Love Pannakoodadhu ? Clue: Breathless
Enyya ? Kaila Oru Mike-u, Satellite TV Irukkunnu, Oru Coat-a Mattittu Neenga Enna Venna Keppinga. Adhukkallam Naan Badhil Sollanuma ?
Eppadiyum Tharkolai Dhaan Senjukkuvennu Neenga Adampudicheenganna Adapathi Enakku Kavalai Illa. Ennaa, Abalai Penngala Thedi Kandupidichu Avangala Kaapaatharadhu Ennodaya Thozhil Illa.
Ende Kaadhali Ungalukku Manaivi Aayittu Varum. Aanal Ungal Manaivi Enikki Kaadhali Aaittu Varaadhu
Nee Engitterundhu Oru Kodi Rooba Eduthittu Pove, Thiruppi Sambaadhichiralaam. En?, Oru Patthu Kilo Thangatha Eduthuttu Pove, Thiruppi Vaangidalaam. Aana, En Chellatha Eduthittu Pona, Eppadi Da ?
Gouravathula Nee Ettadi Paanja, Ongappan Padhinaaradi Paaivaanda. Clue: Jaadhigal Illayadi Paappa
Padi Thaandinaa Pathini Illangaradhu Pazhaya Kadhai. Padi Thaandinaalum Pathini, Pathinidhaan

Jigar Maa Aag Hai

2011-02-02T12:52:00.000-08:00

While I was hibernating under a suitably large and comfortably cozy rock, Karan Johar decided to remake Agneepath

The one filmmaker who can outdo Gautham Menon in effortlessly self-indulgent creative destruction is Karan Johar. As if his lame attempts at original writing were not wreaking enough havoc on the poor masses, he has chosen to unleash his Abacada*-ancalji-aantiji-bachchas oriented sledgehammer on a much loved AB classic

The updates on the forthcoming remake all seem like ominous portents of imminent disaster, as yet another revered classic is laid waste by the misguided zeal of yettanother dimwit. The sorrow is soul-numbing, vast and endless. Extreme measures including intravenously imbibing enormous quantities of Dark Chocolate have failed to lighten the mood.

Key reasons why Agneepath fans have reason to head for the hills and save their fond memories from being smashed to smithereens:

K Jo is helming this no-holds-barred noble deed to satisfy the wishes of his late Father - ostensibly because the original Agneepath was a flop (?!)
The remake is being helmed by a new director (translation - K Jo will ghost direct to glory, and let another lad graciously accept the brickbats)
No Krishnan Iyer Yem.Yaay character in the remake - the presence of the Disco-Dikhati Nariyal-Paaniwala Mithunda with his amazingly atrocious Tambi accent was integral to the original - not for nothing did he win a Filmfare Best Supporting actor award for his role
The players - Time to scream Doom Machale Doom ! Hrithik Roshan replacing AB as Vijay Dinanath Chavan, Sanjay Dutt in the place of Danny as Kancha Cheena, Priyanka Chopra instead of Madhavi as Mary Matthew. Scary dialogue scenario - PC casually saying "Dude, are you like checking me out ?" to HR in the hospital

The one and only silver lining ? No Shah Rukh Khan in the remake.

*Abacada - phonetic version of ABCD => Abroad-but Bharatiya Culchaar-spouting Desis

Berry Gross

2011-01-30T01:05:00.000-08:00

Scene: Bunnu is playing with his breakfast cereal cup - squashing blueberries and splashing milk all over the place

Me: Bunnu, stop playing with your food !
Bunnu: Amma, I am the baby frog. I am very busy right now !
Me: Why ?
Bunnu: Because baby frogs eat flies dipped in milk. I am just crushing the blue flies in my cup to make sure that they are really dead. But some wake up and I have to drown them in milk again.

Chuck-O-Noodles

2011-01-22T18:47:00.000-08:00

Lunchtime wisdom from Bunnu - Eating Maggi is like eating haircut

Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality

2011-01-21T10:41:00.000-08:00

Scene: A decent Sunday lunch has been prepared - Masala Pooris, Alu-Chole and Kheere-ka-Raita, after much huffing and puffing (by myself and the Pooris). I attempt to lamely fish for some compliments to soothe the tired self

Me: Bunnu, did you like the Pooris ?
Bunnu: Yeah. Crunchy and good.
Me: (Enthusiasm bubbling over) If you liked it so much, I'll make it again next week
Bunnu: But don't put any Jeera in it. I want you to make it plain, like it is done in real life

Mush Ado About Nothing

2011-01-18T10:50:00.000-08:00

This blog is as much Bunnu's as it is mine. Apt I feel, that I should write something here as part of his birthday celebrations.

Firmly donning the crystal-ball-clutching-crazy-career-counselor hat, here are some wishes for Bunnu:

If you become a lawyer, hope you'll have the integrity of Finch
If you join Starfleet, hope you'll have the logical reasoning of Spock
If you choose to be a doctor, hope you'll have the diagnostic skills of House
If you grow up to be an architect, hope you'll have the vision of Roark
If you follow the destiny of a Jedi knight, hope you'll have the humanity of Obi-Wan
If you become a hard-nosed bureaucrat, hope you'll have the wit and wile of Appleby
If you discover new worlds as an archaeologist, hope you'll have the temerity of Jones
If you decide to solve mysteries as a sleuth, hope you'll be as intuitive as Holmes
If you delight in being a chef, hope you'll be as innovative as Remy
If you become a teacher, hope you'll have the sincerity and will of Thackeray

Satisfaction Is

2011-01-17T15:24:00.000-08:00

Getting from Here

To Here

with much - "am I so much dumber than a nine year old, "why did I ever allow Bunnu to select such an advanced level puzzle" and "my back and neck muscles are going to go ballistic after this"- soul searching and hand wringing, only to see the wide grin and "Amma rocks" expression on said offspring's face on seeing the completed puzzle

He's Crazy Like a Fool, Goodbye Dada Cool

2011-01-13T08:08:00.000-08:00

After the lackluster showing by KKR in IPL'10, retribution was inevitable during the team selections for IPL'11. Yet, it was slightly shocking to see no takers for Dada - even among the newbie teams.

The team owner (Ka Ka Ka KKR), ostensibly warbled "Bhai Bhai", but in reality meant "No buy, only Bye, Bye"

Souravda is now relegated to playing in Ranji Trophy matches - which could be an unexpected bonanza for the Ranji sponsors - provided he doesn't do the usual return-to-lack-of-form routine

As for the rest of IPL'11, can't wait for Season 4 to get rolling !

A Wake for the Siesta

2011-01-11T12:11:00.000-08:00

Scene: Attempting to come up with a plan to get a multitude of chores done after a leisurely lunch on a Saturday

Me: So we need to go to the library, buy groceries .......
The Spouse: OK
Me: Do you want to go now ?
The Spouse: Whatever. I want to take a nap this afternoon too
Me: Fine. We can take care of the chores afterwards then
The Spouse: You are making me feel guilty about even thinking of an afternoon Nap
Me: But I don't have any issues with it
The Spouse: That's exactly the problem !! I want you to want me to take a Nap ! Then I won't feel bad !

Moral of the Moment:

We are a couple truly Sentimental
One is so Senti that it makes the other Mental

Building Blocks

2011-01-10T00:01:00.000-08:00

Bunnu's teacher asked each kid in class to write one sentence about how they can improve themselves in the New Year

Many kids wrote Hallmark-card-worthy lines like:
"I want to learn more at school"
"I want to be more helpful to my teachers"
"I want to eat healthy food and be stronger"
"I want to be nicer to my family"
"I want to share more with my friends"

Bunnu wrote - "I want Amma to get me more Lego sets so I can build better Legos"

Sigh - we clearly have our priorities.

Some Mothers Do 'ave 'em

2011-01-06T10:26:00.000-08:00

Scene: A fresh-as-a-daisy Bunnu is attempting to wake me up early in the morning

Bunnu: Amma, wake up !
Me: Just ten more minutes
Bunnu: You know, you look like a blue whale
Me: (Rising up at this unjust remark) What ?
Bunnu: Just kidding. I was trying to make you get up, that's all
Me: (Feeling rather mollified) OK, Kanna
Bunnu: You only look like a Blimp

Infinite Loop

2011-01-03T22:43:00.000-08:00

Four are the years that have gone by
Yet the well of tears doesn't run dry
Three there remain still reeling
Under the unbearable heaviness of feeling
Two are the lives we now seem to lead steadfast
The hollow present haunted by the echos of the illusory past
One is the thought that ferrets through the mind in sheer futility
A desire for a single moment as things used to be, with loss a foreign entity

Infinite seems the time allowed to elapse
Since joy ignited every possible synapse
Blissfully unaware of the ferocity in silence's roar
Or the inner loneliness that needs no reason to soar

The life immaculate irreversibly lost
Shattered by the knowledge that nothing can ever last

Hindi Film Dialogues Quiz 4 - The Answers

2010-12-31T19:53:00.000-08:00

Here are the answers to the latest Hindi Film Dialogues Quiz

Thanks to everyone who participated.

The winner: Ravi with a score of 5/10

1) The Country is running through a very bad law and order situation. The criminals are running, the puleece also running ! And running, running but no catching Sir !

Ram Lakhan: A revenge saga with Jackie and Anil playing the titular Ram-Lakhan-ki-Jodi, filmed in typical Subhash Ghai-ishtyle. Lakhan (Anil Kapoor) uses his Engliss skills to perfection to effectively impress the Police Commissioner (Saeed Jaffrey). As an unexpected bonanza, the DCP enlists Lakhan into the Police Force as an Inspector.

2) Hum Koi Chota Kaam Nahin Karte. Khatmalon Ko Maar Maar Kar Khoon Jama Karne Se Blood Bank Nahin Ban Jaata

Betaaj Badshah: The unapologetically cheesy flick featuring the over-the-top quips of "Jaani" Raaj Kumar and the hallmark one-liners of Shatrughan Sinha. This characteristic over-the-top line is voiced in the trademark Shotgun-rumble at a Shaadi ki Baraat

3) Mujhe Khushi Hai Ki Tumhe Hindustani Thappad Ka Andaaza Ho Gaya Hai. Khayaal Rahe Ki Yeh Sirf Ek Haath Tha

Karma: Sholay Reloaded. The dacoit-Thakur theme of Sholay gets retooled with an international terrorist flavour for a new generation of moviegoers. Jingoism, unabashed-Patriotism, Desh vs Dr.Dang (no prizes for guessing who wins of course). The trio of Subhash Ghai-Jackie-Anil are at it again with thespian Dilip Kumar playing the ultimate avenging angel with Anupam Kher (as Dr.Michael Dang) donning Lucifer's garb. This line is spoken by Jailor Vishwa Pratap Singh (Yusufsaab) on delivering a well-aimed slap to noveau prisoner Dr.Dang

4) Shuruaat Hamesha Majboori Se Hi Hoti Hai. Yeh Majboori Aahista Aahista Zaroorat, Aur Zaroorat Aadat Ban Jaati Hai

Johnny Gaddaar: Sriram Raghavan's homage to the umpteen Desi-Noir flicks courtesy Vijay Anand. Who'd a thunk that Dharam Paaji could play a Madrasi gang leader named Seshadri ? He drawls this line to wannabe-gangster Vikram (the zombie-like Neil Nitin Mukesh) when Vikram initially shows interest in joining the gang

5) Ungli Muh Se Aur Tum Kamre Se Baahar ! Out !

Andaaz Apna Apna: A madcap laughathon featuring two poor wastrels Amar and Prem (Aamir and Sallu) chasing two rich damsels (Kareena and Raveena). Paresh Rawal (before he was kidnapped by evil folks and forced to act in insane Priyadarshan comedies) plays twins - the super-rich Ram Gopal Bajaj and the super-evil gangster Teja. Plus the ultimate Shakti Kapoor comic-villain act summed up in three little words - Crime Master Gogo.
This line is the last in a three minute verbal lashing that Ram Gopal Bajaj delivers to Amar and Prem when they meet him to show their "Suitable Sons-in-Law material" status

6) Sawaal Ab Yeh Nahin Ki Paani Barsega Ya Nahin. Sawaal Yeh Nahin Ki Main Jiyunga Ya Maroonga. Sawaal Yeh Hai Ki Is Duniya Ko Banane Wala, Chalane Wala Ko Hai Ya Nahin

Guide - An effervescent Dev and an ethereal Waheeda, the soulful melodies of S.D.Burman - what's not to like ? This line is part of an internal monologue in Raju's (Dev Anand) head after which he decides to stand by the poor villagers who believe him to be their Messiah and fasts unto Death as rain finally graces the drought stricken village

7) Achhe Kharidaar Hamesha Sauda Karne Se Pehle, Doosre Ki Keemat Ka Andaza Laga Lete Hain

Zanjeer : The film that defined the "Angry Young Man" persona of AB for decades to come with the fiery lines provided by Salim-Javed lending able support. This line is spoken by Teja (Ajit) to his moll (Bindu) as he muses about all that he learnt from his boss whom he eventually killed

8) Aisa Lagna Maangta Father, Jaise Jannat Ka Pari, Plane Mein Udkar, Mere Dil Ke Airport Mein Land Kar Rahi Ho

Amar Akbar Anthony: The multi-star, mucho sentiment, Maa and Masala fest with the unmistakable Manmohan Desai stamp all over the place. This line is plaintively voiced by Anthony (AB) to his Catholic-Priest cum guardian (Nasir Husain) to explain the difficulty in finding the right girl, on being asked by the priest to settle down and get married

9) Dekha Saab ? Aaphai Dekh Lo ! Phoolan Devi Ki Jawani Hai, Goonda Gardi Ki Meherbaani Hai

Main Khiladi Tu Anari: Macho Cop Karan (Akshay Kumar) barely manages to tolerate the fawning admiration of namby-pamby filmstar Deepak Kumar (a consummately if unintentionally effeminate Saif Ali Khan) in this masala potboiler. This line is spoken by a beleaguered Police constable (Kader Khan) to Inspector Karan when feisty thief Basanti (Shilpa Shetty) protests being arrested and creates a ruckus at the Police Station

10) Is Aadmi Par Ek Hi Insaan Rang Phaink Sakta Hai

Saudagar: Not the how-can-AB-be-such-a-cad 1973 film but the 1991 extravaganza that fortunately introduced Manisha Koirala and unfortunately introduced Vivek Mushran to poor viewers. But the Ilu, Ilu mush was just a side note since the rhetoric of friends-turned-foes Raaj Kumar and Dilip Kumar took center stage most of the time. This line is spoken by Thakur Rajeshwar Singh (Raaj Kumar) as he throws some Gulaal at old-pal Veer Singh (Dilip Kumar) during Holi

Hindi Film Dialogues Quiz 4

2010-12-23T12:55:00.000-08:00

Guess the Hindi films (actors, situations would be nice too) based on the following dialogues:

Note: Comment Moderation is enabled. All responses along with the answers will be posted in a week

1) The Country is running through a very bad law and order situation. The criminals are running, the puleece also running ! And running, running but no catching Sir !

2) Hum Koi Chota Kaam Nahin Karte. Khatmalon Ko Maar Maar Kar Khoon Jama Karne Se Blood Bank Nahin Ban Jaata

3) Mujhe Khushi Hai Ki Tumhe Hindustani Thappad Ka Andaaza Ho Gaya Hai. Khayaal Rahe Ki Yeh Sirf Ek Haath Tha

4) Shuruaat Hamesha Majboori Se Hi Hoti Hai. Yeh Majboori Aahista Aahista Zaroorat, Aur Zaroorat Aadat Ban Jaati Hai

5) Ungli Muh Se Aur Tum Kamre Se Baahar ! Out !

6) Sawaal Ab Yeh Nahin Ki Paani Barsega Ya Nahin. Sawaal Yeh Nahin Ki Main Jiyunga Ya Maroonga. Sawaal Yeh Hai Ki Is Duniya Ko Banane Wala, Chalane Wala Ko Hai Ya Nahin

7) Achhe Kharidaar Hamesha Sauda Karne Se Pehle, Doosre Ki Keemat Ka Andaza Laga Lete Hain

8) Aisa Lagna Maangta Father, Jaise Jannat Ka Pari, Plane Mein Udkar, Mere Dil Ke Airport Mein Land Kar Rahi Ho

9) Dekha Saab ? Aaphai Dekh Lo ! Phoolan Devi Ki Jawani Hai, Goonda Gardi Ki Meherbaani Hai

10) Is Aadmi Par Ek Hi Insaan Rang Phaink Sakta Hai

Tamizh Film Dialogues Quiz 5 - The Answers

2010-12-19T23:37:00.000-08:00

Many Thanks to all those who participated in the latest Tamizh Dialogues Quiz

Sugar and Spice and Vasu tie for the top score of 5/10. Congratulations !

Here are the answers:

1. Enakku Sachin Pudikkum, Shah Rukh Pudikkum. Endha Ponnukkum Ungala Paatha, Paithiyam Pudikkum

Mozhi: The movie notable for being Jyothika's swan song, establishing Prithviraj as a bona fide Kollywood star and for featuring the memorable scene where grouchy Bramhanandam gets poleaxed by the sight of musical maverick Viji (Prakash Raj) abandoning his decorum and attire while enthusiastically dancing to Harry Belafonte's rendition of Hava Nagila. This line is spoken to Karthik (Prithviraj) by lovestruck neighbouring girl Preethi (Neelima)

2. Kaludhaikku Theriyuma Karuvaattu Vaasanai ?

Singaravelan: The taming of the shrewish Sumathi (Khushboo), courtesy rustic lad Velan (Kamalahasan) with ample family sentiments and old rivalries thrown in for good measure. Kamal throws this quip on seeing an auto-driver flee unpaid due to being overcome by the smell of the fish he'd brought along.

3. Indha Muttayallam Saivama Maathinaanga Therima. Adhukku Marunaallendhu Indha Beer-laam Cool Drinks-a Maathittaanga

Dheena: The directorial debut of A.R.Murugadoss had his trademark gratuitous violence, non-stop action and an engaging storyline. A film that solidified Ajith's "Thala" status. This line is coolly spoken by a sniggering sidekick as he attempts to get Ajith drunk

4. Nallavangala Aandavan Sodhippaan, Kaivudamaattan. Kettavangalukku Andavan Neraya Kuduppaan, Aana Kai Vuttuduvaan

Baasha: The father of all dogooder-with-a-stunning-backstory dramedies. This line is one among the many fierce fireworks that crackle between righteous Hero Maanikkam (Rajini) and evil-personified villain Anthony (Raghuvaran)

5. Avar Pandhai Pidikkavillai. Pandhu Dhaan Avarai Pidithadhu

Chennai-600028: A rather unconventional film with the underlying motto "will play cricket for booze". The witty dialogues, believable characterizations and an inspired climax highlighted the strong debut venture of Director Venkat Prabhu. The cricket commentary courtesy Badava Gopi was sheer genius. This line is acerbically spoken by commentator Gopi when butterfingers-fielder Seenu (Premji Amaran) somehow manages to pull-off a catch, unfortunately off a no-ball during the crucial semi-final match between arch-rivals - Sharks and Rockers

6. Dei, Onnamari Duplicate Sarakkadichittu Platforathula Vaandhi Edukkara Partyaada Naanu ? Original Saapttu Urchaagama Pesaravanda

Minnale: Before Kaakka Kaakka, before VTV, before Gautham Menon reached the abominable self-realization that he was Hitchcock-reincarnated, there was Minnale - a simple story imaginatively picturized, the absence of any real villain lending a rather nice touch to this feel-good romance. Vivek's one-liner zingers were peppered liberally through the film, preventing a mush-overdose. Vivek emotionally fires this quip during a drinking-session when a pal doubts his sincerity in helping lovestruck Rajesh (Madhavan) locate the object of his affection (Reema Sen)

7. Graamamum Cook-a ? Neengalum Cook-u

Michael Madana Kamarajan - The madcap drama with Kamal in quadruple avatars, with Crazy Mohan's trademark laugh-riot wordplay dialogues. Kamal played the Palakkad-cook Kameswaran to perfection, with able support from Urvasi as the thieving-granny-stricken damsel Tripurasundari. This line is spoken by Urvasi as she "Vazhinju Kottifys" before Kamal while discreetly trying to put back his father's Vethala Potti that had been stolen by her grandmother.

8. Kashtappattu Olachaa Jeyikkamudiyaadhu. Ishtappattu Olachaathaan Jeyikka Mudiyum

Ghajini: Surya's rise to superstardom was complete with his turn as the ultra-rich, ubercool tycoon Sanjay Ramaswamy who falls for the endearing web of lies spun by also-ran Ad-film starlet Kalpana (Asin). The impact of the breezy scenes was magnified by the gruesomely tragic undercurrents and Director Murugadoss's film succeeded in every language it was released in. This line is spoken by Surya in the Sanjay Ramaswamy-intro speech

9. Idho Paarunga Sir. Unga Kitta Kaadhala Vitrennu Solradhukku Thaan Naan Panam Vaanginen. Onga Thangachikitta Sollanumna Adhukku Thani Rate Aagum

Thiruvilaiyaadal Aarambam: A rather refreshing take on the age-old conflict between a PYT's suitor (Dhanush) and her brother (Prakash Raj) - with Dhanush finding imaginative ways to best Prakash Raj at his own game and bring the poor man one step closer to apoplexy, mostly minus sentimental dialogues and bloodshed. This line is uttered by Dhanush to Prakash Raj to explain why he did not slink away quietly on being paid a few Lakhs by Prakash Raj

10. Apsaras-ku Dhaadi Ellam Irukkuma Enna ?

Veera: A cheery masala-entertainer from Rajini, before he went all-message-for-full-mileage. This line is spoken by Y.G.Mahendran who pays Rajini's village sidekick on seeing Devayani's (Meena) father's face peeking out of the palanquin while listening to Rajini joyously claim to have seen a celestial nymph in the palanquin

Day Another Day

2010-12-16T10:36:00.000-08:00

Scene: A sunny Thursday morning. Bunnu's busy colouring some Christmas cards

Me: Bunnu, we are going for a train ride on Saturday. Aren't you excited ?
Bunnu: Not really
Me: Why ?
Bunnu: If today was tomorrow, then the tomorrow will be Saturday. Then I'll be excited

(My coffee-deprived brain takes a long while to understand what he meant)

Unable to come up with even one suitable rejoinder, I escape courtesy an off-key rendition of Kal Bhi Aaj Bhi, Aaj Bhi Kal Bhi

Tamizh Film Dialogues Quiz 5

2010-12-10T11:25:00.000-08:00

Guess the Tamizh films (actors, situations would be a bonus) based on the following dialogues.

Note 1: Comment moderation is enabled. Answers and all responses will be published in about a week

Note 2: To answer a reader's question - there isn't any common thread between all the dialogues

Enakku Sachin Pudikkum, Shah Rukh Pudikkum. Endha Ponnukkum Ungala Paatha, Paithiyam Pudikkum
Kaludhaikku Theriyuma Karuvaattu Vaasanai ?
Indha Muttayallam Saivama Maathinaanga Therima. Adhukku Marunaallendhu Indha Beer-laam Cool Drinks-a Maathittaanga
Nallavangala Aandavan Sodhippaan, Kaivudamaattan. Kettavangalukku Andavan Neraya Kuduppaan, Aana Kai Vuttuduvaan
Avar Pandhai Pidikkavillai. Pandhu Dhaan Avarai Pidithadhu
Dei, Onnamari Duplicate Sarakkadichittu Platforathula Vaandhi Edukkara Partyaada Naanu ? Original Saapttu Urchaagama Pesaravanda
Graamamum Cook-a ? Neengalum Cook-u
Kashtappattu Olachaa Jeyikkamudiyaadhu. Ishtappattu Olachaathaan Jeyikka Mudiyum
Idho Paarunga Sir. Unga Kitta Kaadhala Vitrennu Solradhukku Thaan Naan Panam Vaanginen. Onga Thangachikitta Sollanumna Adhukku Thani Rate Aagum
Apsaras-ku Dhaadi Ellam Irukkuma Enna ?

Comeback Comeuppance

2010-12-04T15:36:00.000-08:00

Scene 1: Bunnu coughs a bit while playing one evening

Me: Are you OK ? Your cough sounded funny
Bunnu: I don't know. You should ask my cough

Scene 2: Bunnu's determinedly poking at the dining table with a sharp pen

Me: Bunnu, stop doing that. Don't hurt the table !
Bunnu: But am only helping the table
Me: How ?
Bunnu: The table is sick and I am giving it some shots to make it feel better

Dark lining to a silver cloud

2010-11-22T12:56:00.000-08:00

To paraphrase S&G

November I'll remember
The days once warm have now grown cold

Its dull, windy and wet. The ground a patchwork quilt of multicoloured leaves, the trees nearly shorn of foliage, the inevitable onslaught of frost quelling the rebelliously verdant shrubs.

The weather's gloomy enough to send even the Energizer Bunny into a downward spiral (no wonder the season's called Fall).

Time to seek solitude and solace in the snuggly swirl of song. Here be some favourites:

Cloudy - The gentle guitar riffs and the sheer bounciness in Simon's voice are enough to blast the chill away
Autumn Leaves - Sinatra's sombre baritone is the pitch perfect blend of wistfulness and poignancy
In My Life - A sure winner for the earnest simplicity of the lyrics and for McCartney's heartfelt rendition
Raindrops Keep Falling - Butch n Sundance, bubbling over with sheer exuberance, blazing away to glory unmindful of the hail of bullets
California Dreamin' - The catchy classic courtesy the Mamas and the Papas, the cheery verse a welcome splash of light on a drizzly day

Perennial Lament

2010-11-15T21:50:00.000-08:00

Looks pleasing to the eye, visage a rosy red
Shapely and winsome, unquestionably well bred
Blissfully basking in the warmth of loving attention
The headiness of youth chasing away thoughts of caution
Forcibly taken away from home to unknown lands
Devastated by the torment inflicted by purposeful hands
Attempts to escape quelled savagely
Onlookers inert, content in observing silently
Beaten, pulverized, feasted on by many
Until death offered final, merciful company
Shed a sympathetic tear one ought to
On seeing the tragic life of a ripe tomato

The Wound

2010-11-14T21:33:00.000-08:00

Words, a sheer scythe
Slashing through a quavering psyche
The hurt abominable
Lingering, Festering
Unceasing, Uncauterized
Rising, fed by fears
Irrevocable emotional gangrene nears
Dripping, Gushing
Bloodless, Stinging
Soul Tears

Cinderfella

2010-11-10T21:40:00.000-08:00

Me: Bunnu, why are you staring at the clock ?
Bunnu: Waiting for it to be midnight
Me: OK
Bunnu: I want it to be midnight soon
Me: Why ?
Bunnu: When it becomes midnight, then it will be Zero'O'Clock. Then the clock will get scared and fall down since it doesn't have the number Zero on it. I want to see that

Through The Looking Glass

2010-11-09T14:44:00.000-08:00

The album was a wedding gift from a lovelorn suitor, a testament to her inability to rebel against the norm. She'd wistfully treasured the album over the years, lavishing utmost care in arranging photographs of significance, willing his presence to linger on as a backdrop to every important moment that crystallized in her life

She brought it out carefully, at the eager insistence of a friend she'd met after ages.

Flip....The photo of her newlywed self, face flushed, her husband's arms firmly around her. Only she knew the torrid scene he'd created on seeing her harmlessly smile at the photographer, the flush arising out of shame, his grip on her a declaration of authority

Flip....Cradling her newborn daughter close, tears glistening in her eyes. Even the normally stoic nurses in the maternity ward had been shaken by his angry outburst on the birth of a daughter instead of the son he'd wanted, his constant threats to disown the child due to the lack of any visible resemblance

Flip...Smiling on a bridge over the Seine, a silk scarf around her neck,a bouquet of red roses in her husband's hand. He'd become enraged that she'd lost her purse on the streets of Paris, cruelly twisting his scarf around her neck in a seemingly deserted bridge, unaware of the old flower-seller who had come running on hearing her cries of pain, charmingly assuaging the old woman's doubts by buying a bunch of roses and making her take their photo

Frame after glossy frame, grains of sand in the mind's eye

"Lovely photos. What a life you've led !" exclaimed her friend enviously

Reality, smoothed over and airbrushed. The picture perfect life.

Morning Raaga

2010-11-06T21:01:00.000-07:00

Its a warm, sunny weekend morning. The Spouse impulsively decides to take Bunnu cycling.

The psyche thrills at the prospect of an unscheduled, uncharted hour ahead. The minute the car leaves the driveway, I transform from a routine-driven drone into a blissfully Emsworthian creature

I deposit myself into the most comfortable spot on the Sofa and carefully select a set of Mohammad Rafi melodies to match the mood. The soulful notes of Mujhe Dekhkar Aap Ka Muskurana fill the room, making me dreamily recalls black and white images of a mellow Musafir smiling up at a demure Hasina , from a memory cache fortified by compulsively watching Chitrahaar every week.

The lull is broken by a horn blaring on the road nearby and I realize in panic that the hour is almost up. The madness to get lunch ready begins in earnest and I stumblingly manage to get most of it done before my time runs out. I wash raw rice in a bowl and add the requisite water, readying it for cooking in the microwave. With the heart still lost in the tunes emanating from the speakers, I turn on the microwave

A short while later, I hear the car pulling in. I give a satisfied glance around the kitchen, but something about the counter doesn't seem quite right. The eyes focus on the bowl of raw rice still sitting on the counter. The thought process wakens slowly while logic chimes in that the whirr of the microwave indicates that rice is getting done. With a sense of dread, I open the microwave, to be met with the reproachful stare of a lone paper towel.

"Amma, I am really hungry !!!", chirps Bunnu as he runs into the house

Ghosts of Deepavalis Past

2010-11-02T13:14:00.000-07:00

So I'm minding my own business and thinking that I should just buy some sweets and snacks from a shop for this Deepavali. The mind logically reels off the multiple advantages to this approach :

No weekday evening rush to buy cooking supplies
No slaving it out in the kitchen until midnight
No tension if the goodies I make will come out well or if they'll obtain the family's seal of approval
No need to plead with the Spouse to go grocery shopping or to keep Bunnu out of the kitchen
No chances of burning self with hot oil or bubbling sweet dishes
No need to cause composure levels to reach threadbare proportions while deciphering sugar syrup thread consistencies
No massive post-prep kitchen cleanup or dish washing
The Spouse will be glad at the prospect of freely opining about the quality of various treats from the shops
Peaceful atmosphere, minimal stress, no objections from those at home or the extended family

I begin to relax at the prospect of a chilled-out festival of lights. Relief kicks in that no one is complaining about this. Just when the decision seems to be a done deal, the real ruckus begins. No, it's not the living that have problems with this. It's the dear departed, who seem to have abandoned the bliss of genially floating about the Universe in favour of criticizing me en-masse (en-sans-masse ??), unkindly calling me a short-sighted undertaker, in reference to the short-cut method that I plan to undertake

I feel like running on the streets screaming "I see dead people !!!" - but alas, it's not the warm and fuzzy Aura of a sympathetic Bruce Willis that accompanies me but the formidable quartet of the Father, the Maternal Grandfather and the Paternal Grandparents, their disdain and disgust weighing heavily upon me

I weakly attempt to come up with justifications and excuses for changing tactics this year.

Me: Isn't it all about feeling festive and happy ? Lighting lamps in hearts and spreading warmth and cheer ?
V.Thatha: Do you think this is Christmas and I'm Santa ? How can it be Deepavali without you making any Bhakshanams ? No point in calling it a festival if it's devoid of you going about stuffing yummy home-made goodies into the unsuspecting mouths of all and sundry. Just because I can no longer eat anything or feed anyone, don't you dare think that I will tolerate you shaming me this way !
Me: But, but, I really don't have much time
M.Paatti: There is never enough time. The hand that rocks the cradle, is the one that makes the Laddoos. Stay up all night and make everything while the rest of the family sleeps. I've done it using a single kerosene stove in the midst of chilly Delhi winters. You have a five-burner range, all manners of kitchen appliances, a husband willing to take care of your son anytime and a warm cubicle to rest in during the day. What more do you want ?
Me: But there's no real enthusiasm or encouragement from the family. What if my efforts are met with a lukewarm response ?
R.Thatha: Don't bother about all that Ma. We never show any enthusiasm or encouragement. Once you make all the sweets and the Uppu Bhakshanams*, everyone will only be too eager to consume them. Plus you have the advantage that Mappillai* doesn't mind even if you don't make Deepavali Marundhu*
Me: But the overall stress levels will go sky-high ! I'll end up losing my cool and start hitting my head with the Thengozhal Naazhi* or fill my ears with Vella Paagu* to make it all stop
Appa: Kanna, why are you thinking so much ? Just make something simple. One sweet and one savoury should do. You don't even have to worry about distributing to neighbours and getting poor feedback from them
Me: But what's so wrong if I just buy everything this one time ?
The Formidable Foursome: It's totally up to you actually. We are just voices in your head, incapable of influencing your actions or changing your viewpoint. Just ignore us
Me: OK, OK. I will go to the Indian store this evening and buy supplies. But I'll make only three sweets and two salty snacks. You can't guilt me into making any more with your non-existent faux-sad faces and even-more-faux-sighs
The Formidable Foursome: Whatever makes you happy Kannamma
Me: Ha, I showed them who's boss !!

*Uppu Bhakshanams: Savoury Snacks
*Mappillai: Son-in-Law
*Deepavali Marundhu: Paste-like multi-spice concoction consumed to aid digestion
*Thengozhal Naazhi - Press/mold for making snacks of various shapes
*Vella Paagu - Jaggery Syrup

UPDATE: The three sweets and two snacks have been prepared as of Thursday evening. Here are some pictures plus the recipe for the Date and Nut Laddoos by popular demand :-)

Date and Nut Laddus

Peanut Chikki

Mysorepak

Ribbon Pakoda

Wheat Flour Thengozhal

Date and Nut Laddoo Recipe:

Ingredients:

Dates - 500 gm

Pista - 150 gm
Badam - 150 gm
Sugar - half cup
Ghee - 2 tablespoons

Method:
Deseed and coarsely chop the dates. Chop the Pista and Badam into slivers
Using a food processor, pulverize the dates into tiny bits
Heat Ghee in a wok or a heavy-bottomed saucepan, add the date mixture
Once the dates soften, add the sugar
Add the chopped nuts once the sugar blends in
Stir well until everything mixes in evenly and switch off the flame
Shape into Laddoos once the mixture cools down and store in an air-tight container

A question of answers

2010-11-01T21:40:00.000-07:00

Some recent queries from Bunnu:

I don't like your shadow. Can you walk without it ?
Appa looks really old. Is he sixty years old ?
I don't want to bless you. Isn't it bad manners ? (Bless You = Sneeze on you)
Do dinosaurs wear underwear ? When T-Rex eats other dinosaurs, does he eat their underwear too ?
I don't want to clean up my toys. Don't you always do it after I sleep ?
Why we only cut our hair ? Why we don't cut our body ?

Affirmative Action

2010-10-28T20:29:00.000-07:00

Bunnu: Appa, can I watch TV today ?
The Spouse: No
Bunnu: But you promised me last night that I could see TV today !!
The Spouse: What I told you Yesterday was -
(Bunnu Interrupts Excitedly)
Bunnu: You told Yes Appa. That's why last night is called Yesterday
The Spouse: ??

Hindi Film Dialogues Quiz 3 - The Answers

2010-10-28T13:24:00.000-07:00

Here are the answers (with links to the corresponding videos) to the latest Hindi Film Dialogues Quiz

The winner: Ravi with a score of 6/10

All ten dialogues were spoken by Amitabh Bachchan in various films.

1) Main Aur Meri Tanhayee Aksar Yeh Baatein Karte Hain. Tum Hoti Toh Aisa Hota. Tum Hoti Toh Waisa Hota

Silsila: Reel-life met real-life in a disconcerting manner in this Yash Chopra love-polygon. These lines are spoken by Amit (The Bachchan) about his object of affection, Chandni (Rekha) as a prelude to the "Ye Kahaan Aa Gaye Hum" melody. Here's the link.

2) Samajh Ki Baat Hai. Kyonki, Samajh Samajh Ke Samajh Ko Samjho Toh Samajhna Bhi Ek Samajh Hai, Samajh Gaye ?

Mahaan: Nothing succeeds like excess. What could be better than one AB ? Why, three ABs of course ! AB plays father (Amit) and twin sons (Guru and Shankar) in this multi-generational revenge saga. These lines are spoken by Guru while being questioned at gunpoint by menacing baddie Vikram (Amjad Khan) about the originality of a necklace. Here's the link.

3) Jis Kanoon Ne Aapko Mere Liye Ajnabi Bana Diya, Main Apne Aap Ko Us Kanoon Ke Hawale Kaise Kar Sakta Hoon ?

Shakti: Emosanal Atyachaar set the tone of this gripping dramedy which pitted the histrionics of thespian Dilip Kumar against the silently smouldering volcano that was Bachchan. Added bonus: soon-to-be angry-young-man personified Anil Kapoor makes a guest appearance towards the end of this film. This line is spoken by Vijay (AB) to his father, DCP Ashwini Kumar (Dilipsaab) as they stand firmly on opposite sides of the law, with ma Sheetal (Rakhee) steadfastly holding on to the tenuous link between father and son. Here's the link.

4) Kabhi Kabhi Do Baatein Na Hote Huey Bhi Ho Jaateen Hain

Chupke Chupke: The evergreen classic, honed with the unmistakably endearing mindset of Hrishikesh Mukherjee. "Confusion hi Confusion Hai Solution Kuch Pata Nahin" screams Sukumar Sinha (AB), the gifted Professor of Literature, to his friend and colleague Dr. Parimal Tripathi (Dharmendra) while their bemused pal P.K.Srivastava (Asrani) looks on in this intentional comedy of errors. Here's the link - with identity crisis related zingers like "Woh Tum Jo Main Hoon Aur Woh Main Jo Tum Ho" and Amitabh's goofy laugh towards the end of this video. Priceless

5) Arey Babuji ! Aisi English Aave That I Can Leave Angrej Behind

Namak Halaal: Slapstick comedy at its best with a sizzling Parveen Babi and a smashing soundtrack to boot. These lines are spoken by Arjun (AB) to his prospective employer, hotel manager Ranjeet (Ranjeet), to display his unquestionably fluent skills in the English language. Remade into Tamizh as Velaikaran starring Rajni. Here is the link

6) Apun Jiske Darwaze Pe Paon Rakhta Hai Na, Uska Akha Department Ka Darwaza Bandh Ho Jaata Hai

Laawaris: Lambuji Big B plays the eponymous Laawaris in characteristic Tapori-ishtyle with dialogues to match. The luminous Zeenat Aman provides the requisite romantic fodder. Here's the link.

7) Bacha Sawaal Ki Main Kahaan Ka Hoon. Toh Kuch Log Aise Bhi Toh Hote Hain Jo Kahin Ke Nahin Hote

Kaala Patthar: AB plays Vijay Pal Singh, a man unsuccessfully attempting to run away from past demons by burying himself in the life of a coal miner. But the present ironically makes it difficult for him to break away from self-imposed shackles. This line is cynically thrown out by AB when the town's doctor Sudha Sen (Raakhee) innocently questions him about his past whereabouts. Here's the link.

8) Dushman Se Agar Faayda Ho Toh Usko Apna Dost Banalo, Tumhi Bola Tha Na Tumhare Dhande Ka Usool Hai. Usool Hai Ki Nahin, Ayen ?

Agneepath: Bachchan vs Danny, Take 5432. AB plays Vijay Dinanath Chauhan, out to avenge the desecration and destruction of his honest schoolmaster father Dinanath (Alok Nath) while Danny plays Kancha Cheena, bad-guy-extraordinaire. Here's the link.

9) Main Sabse Pehle Sign Nahin Karoonga. Jao Pehle Us Aadmi Ka Sign Lekar Aao Jisne Mere Baap Se Sign Liya Tha

Deewaar: In a time before Paa, the importance of the mater was immortalized in a single line - Mere Paas Maa Hai - by honest cop Ravi (Shashi Kapoor) to his I-coudn't-give-a-tuppenny-damn-about-honesty elder sibling Vijay (AB) in this film chock-full of vintage Salim-Javed dialogues. This line is spoken by AB to remind his brother that there are other criminals, far worse than himself, who should be brought to book before AB can sign himself into prison. Here is the link.

10) Saala Nautanki. Ghadi Ghadi Drama Karta Hai

Sholay: The laconic cynicism of Jai (AB) was the perfect contrast to the impulsive brashness of Veeru (Dharmendra) in this grandmother-of-all Indian masala-fests. These lines are spoken by a weary Jai after Veeru pleads with him to speak with Basanti's (Hema Malini) aunt to ensure a swift and smooth Veeru-Basanti wedding. Here is the link.

Existential Angst

2010-10-27T15:22:00.000-07:00

During the everyday ritual that is the home-work drive
A question buzzes incessantly in the mind's hive
To thrive, one needs to survive
But to even want to survive, isn't it essential to thrive ?

Hindi Film Dialogues Quiz 3

2010-10-21T17:06:00.000-07:00

Note: Comment Moderation is enabled. All responses along with the answers will be posted in a few days

Guess the Hindi films (actors, situations would be nice too) based on the following dialogues:

Clue: All ten lines are spoken by one actor, in different films

1) Main Aur Meri Tanhayee Aksar Yeh Baatein Karte Hain. Tum Hoti Toh Aisa Hota. Tum Hoti Toh Waisa Hota

2) Samajh Ki Baat Hai. Kyonki, Samajh Samajh Ke Samajh Ko Samjho Toh Samajhna Bhi Ek Samajh Hai, Samajh Gaye ?

3) Jis Kanoon Ne Aapko Mere Liye Ajnabi Bana Diya, Main Apne Aap Ko Us Kanoon Ke Hawale Kaise Kar Sakta Hoon ?

4) Kabhi Kabhi Do Baatein Na Hote Huey Bhi Ho Jaateen Hain

5) Arey Babuji ! Aisi English Aave That I Can Leave Angrej Behind

6) Apun Jiske Darwaze Pe Paon Rakhta Hai Na, Uska Akha Department Ka Darwaza Bandh Ho Jaata Hai

7) Bacha Sawaal Ki Main Kahaan Ka Hoon. Toh Kuch Log Aise Bhi Toh Hote Hain Jo Kahin Ke Nahin Hote

8) Dushman Se Agar Faayda Ho Toh Usko Apna Dost Banalo, Tumhi Bola Tha Na Tumhare Dhande Ka Usool Hai. Usool Hai Ki Nahin, Ayen ?

9) Main Sabse Pehle Sign Nahin Karoonga. Jao Pehle Us Aadmi Ka Sign Lekar Aao Jisne Mere Baap Se Sign Liya Tha

10) Saala Nautanki. Ghadi Ghadi Drama Karta Hai

Train of Thought

2010-10-20T10:55:00.000-07:00

Bunnu: Amma, can you read a book with me ?
Me: OK.(while he runs off and gets a set of books)
Me: Why are you standing with the books ? Come and sit next to me
Bunnu: The engine can't pull in until the buffers are set correctly
Me: What ?
Bunnu: Can you move your feet so that I can sit on your lap comfortably ?

Hear Say

2010-10-18T19:35:00.000-07:00

Scene: Bunnu's clanging steel saucepans with spoons and raising a massive ruckus in the kitchen

Me: Bunnu, stop doing that. The noise is too much !
(No response, clanging continues)
Me: Bunnu, put the spoons away and go and play outside the kitchen
(No response, clanging increases in intensity)
Me: Bunnu, you need to use your listening ears !
Bunnu: I don't have them with me right now
Me: Why ?
Bunnu: Listening ears are for school. I leave them there when I come home

Yaara Dildara

2010-10-15T15:33:00.000-07:00

The BFF to me over the phone, in the midst of a cozy commiseration session

Yoon Samajh Lo Ki Main Tumhari Pati Hoon Aur Tum Meri

Kabhi Kabhi Mere Dil Mein Khayaal Aata Hai

2010-10-15T14:46:00.000-07:00

Apne Paon Pe Kulhaada Maarna Zaroori Ho Jaataa Hai
Jab Paon Ki Bediyon Ko Todne Ka Koi Aur Raasta Na Ho

Aayiram Golu Paartha Anubava Sigamani

2010-10-13T20:54:00.000-07:00

The festival season is fully upon us. Maamis, young and old, are showing off their colourful plumage for all to see, much like the way the Tulips bloom in Amsterdam in Spring

But the season is fraught with pressure - on the Golu attendees, the Golu keepers and the family members of Golu keepers who become collateral damage in the whole process. Frustration, feline fights, a flash of temper and a war of words often result, causing much unpleasantness to all concerned.

It is said that music is the language of the soul and a few soulful tunes can go a long way towards soothing distraught participants. Without further ado, here are a few common Golu-flashpoint scenarios, with appropriate songs (along with Youtube song links for practice sessions !) that folks can yodel to lighten the mood:

1) Maamas, on seeing a hefty Golu crowd at home, feeling hopeful of a narrow escape from consuming bucketfuls of leftover Sundal in the name of dinner

Oli Mayamaana Edhirkaalam En Ullathil Therigiradhu
Indha Ulagam Paadum Paadalosai Kaadhil Vizhugiradhu

Olimayamaana Edhirkaalam from Pachai Vilakku - could only get the Audio part on Youtube

2) Mamis waiting for the husband cum chauffer to show up in the evening, for driving them to must-see Golu destinations

Vaaraai Nee Vaaraai
Pogumidam Vegu Dhooram Illai Nee Vaarai

Vaaraai Nee from Mandhiri Kumari - the song is in the time frame 1:38 to 4:28 of this video

3) Neighbouring maamis vying with each other as the first stop for common Golu visitors

Angum Ingum Paadhai Undu, Inru Nee Endha Pakkam
Gyayir Undu Thingal Undu Endhan Naal Undhan Naalo

Angum Ingum from Avargal

4) Maamis trying unsuccessfully to convince Golu guests to sing should maneuver thusly

Paattum Naane Bhaavamum Naane
Paadum Unai Naan Paadavaippene

Paattum Naane from Thiruvilayaadal

5) Maamas roused out of slumber to franctically rush for extra Vethalai/Thengai for latecomers

Ullathil Nalla Ullam Urangaadhenbadhu Vallavan Vaguthadada
(Kumbha)Karnaa ! Varuvadhai Edhirkollada

Ullathil Nalla Ullam from Karnan

6) Young damsels on being condemned by strict parents for their risque Golu attire

Akkadannu Naanga Udai Poatta Thukkadannu Neenga Edaipoatta
Tada Unakku Tadaaaa

Akkadaannu from Indian

7) Menfolk being completely ignored (and hence leading an unexpectedly peaceful life) by the totally-busy-with-Golu ladies of the house

Raaman Aandaalum Raavanan Andaalum Enakkoru Kavalai Illai
Naandhaan En Manasukku Raja Vaangungadaa Velliyil Gooja

Raaman Aandalum from Mullum Malarum

8) Golu keepers dismayed on being caught by an astute Golu guest for recycling a crumpled sundal packet and frayed blouse piece, sing to the tune of "Sippi Irukkudhu"

Sundal Irukkudhu Ravikkai Irukkudhu Thirandhu Paarka Neramilladi Raajathi
Maatri Kodukkavum Veesi Eriyavum Manasu Varala Purinjukkodi Raajathi

Sippi Irukkudhu from Varumaiyin Niram Sivappu

9) Socialista Senoritas afraid of being outcast by previously-ignored, newly famous Golu Keepers

Ninaivo Oru Paravai, Virikkum Adhan Siragai
Parakkum Adhu Kalakkum Than Uravai

Ninaivo Oru Paravai from Sigappu Rojaakkal

10) Golu keepers reeling under the onslaught of uninvited Maamis who "pile on" with invited guests

Yaadum Oore Yaavarum Kelir
Anbe Engal Ulaga Thattuvam

Yaadum Oore from Ninaithaale Inikkum

11) Kids feeling sad that they have to read all their text books on Vijaya Dasami after coolly bidding adieu to anything remotely knowledge-related the previous day

Paadariyaen padippariyaen pallikkoodandhaanariyaen
Aedariyaen ezhuththariyaen ezhuththuvaga naanariyaen
Aettula ezhudhavilla ezhudhivechchup pazhakkamilla
Elakkanam padikkavilla thalaganamum enakku illa

Paadariyen from Sindhu Bhairavi

Tamizh Dialogues Quiz 4 - The Answers

2010-10-12T16:01:00.020-07:00

Many thanks to everyone who participated in the recent Tamizh film dialogues quiz.

The winner - Jeyachitra with a score of 7/10

Most readers got the gist of the Clue - "For Whom The Bell Tolls" - which translates into Tamizh as "Evarukkaga Mani Adikkiradho". All the dialogues are from Tamizh films directed by Mani Ratnam - since a reader had asked for a MR quiz in a comment on the previous quiz.

The answers are given below:

1) Unakkenna Venum ? Vellaya Oru Thol. Naalu Vaarthai English-la Pesanum. Avlavudhaana ?

Thalapathy - Surya (Rajinikanth) throws these words at lady-love Subbulakshmi (Shobana) when she informs him of her upcoming arranged marriage with the town's new Collector (Arvind Swamy). A short and scornful dismissal of two stereotypical facets desired in a prospective TamBram groom

2) Vichu Susi Ellam Thoongiyacha ?

Agni Natchathiram - Anjali (Amala) surprises her Beau Gautham (Prabhu) by stealthily breaking into his house and sauntering into his room in the still watches of the night. On seeing his shocked expression, she coolly asks if his parents (Vishwanath and Susheela) are snoring away in Slumberland

3) Madras-la Naalana Kudutha Pichakaaran Kooda Enna Idhu-nu Thiruppi Kuduthuruvaan

Alaipayuthey - Karthik (Madhavan) hisses this line to his family as his father (Pyramid Natarajan) drones on for the nth time about how he had to struggle to earn even 25 paise in his youth

4) Srirangam P.T.Usha ! Wait ! Wait !

Thiruda Thiruda - Cheerfully plump CBI Officer Lakshminarayanan (S.P.Balasubramaniam) plaintively bleats out this line to his wife (Renuka) as she races ahead of him on a railway platform to catch a Srirangam-bound train, while he pants along with difficulty, unable to keep pace with his fleet-footed wife

5) Naalu Kaasu Sambaadhikkanumna Saavanum. Sambaaricha Kaasa Veettukku Kondarathukulla Ratha Adi Padanum

Nayakan - Velu Nayakkar (Kamal) patiently tries to justify his "I-am-the-Law" approach in simplistic terms to his daughter Charu (Karthika) as she smolders with righteous indignation at his high handedness in dealing with offenders

6) Veetla Ennadanna Vendaadha Aala Kalyanam Pannikka Solraanga. Vendiya Aalu Kalyaname Vendangararu

Aayitha Ezhuthu - Geetha (Esha Deol) bemoans her marital-dilemma predicament to unperturbed born-genius lover Michael (Surya) as they roam the streets of Madras on his bike. This is the prelude to the "Nenjam Ellam Kaadhal" song in which Adnan Sami effortlessly surpasses a wounded walrus in sheer howling abilities

7) Adi, Odhai, Thiruttukkum Econometrics-kum Romba Dooram

Mouna Raagam - Divya (Revathy) half-heartedly tries to shoo away a determined lovestruck-rowdy Manohar (Karthik) as he tries to win her affections by expressing interest in her college texts. This sets up the scene for the beloved coffee shop "Mr.Chandramouli" encounter

8) Enna Konduvandhirukkeenga ? Kalla, Kayira ? Naan Tharkolai Senjukka

Kannathil Muthamittaal - Indira (Simran) lashes out at Civil Engineer cum fiery story writer neighbour-crush Thiruchelvan (Madhavan) after he is seemingly unmoved by another guy perusing her via an officially-sanctioned "bride seeing" ceremony

9) Ungalukku Naan Vendaamnu Kuppaila Erinjitteengala ? Illa Mathavanga Solraanganu Erijitteengala ?

Iruvar - Budding starlet Kalpana (Aishwarya Rai) storms into the office of Chief Minister Anandhan (Mohanlal) and woodenly laments the sad state of their affair - after he fails to show up for a secret wedding that would have somewhat legitimized their clandestine relationship

10) Naan Ungala Vilai Pesa Varalai. Kalyaanam Pesa Vandhirukken

Pagal Nilavu - Town biggie Devarajan (Sathyaraj) soothes the ruffled feathers of Police Inspector Manohar (Sarath Babu) during a mission to convince the Inspector to agree to a match between his sister Jyothi (Revathy) and her hopelessly morose suitor Selvam (Murali)

Tamizh Dialogues Quiz 4

2010-10-06T15:33:00.000-07:00

Guess the Tamizh films (actors, situations would be good too) based on the following dialogues.

Note: Comment moderation is enabled. Answers and all responses will be published on Wednesday (October 13th) - due to requests for "extra time" from a few readers

Clue: For Whom The Bell Tolls - applicable to all 10 dialogues.

To all those who have submitted responses - everyone has got at least one correct. Now please re-read the Clue !

1) Unakkenna Venum ? Vellaya Oru Thol. Naalu Vaarthai English-la Pesanum. Avlavudhaana ?
2) Vichu Susi Ellam Thoongiyaacha ?
3) Madras-la Naalana Kudutha, Pichakaaran Kooda Enna Idhu-nu Thiruppi Kuduthuruvaan
4) Srirangam P.T.Usha ! Wait, wait !
5) Naalu Kaasu Sambaadhikkanumna Saavanum. Sambaaricha Kaasa Veettukku Kondaarathukulla Rattha Adi Padanum
6) Veetla Ennadaanna Vendaadha Aala Kalyanam Pannikka Solraanga. Vendiya Aalu Kalyaname Vendaangararu
7) Adi, Odhai, Thiruttukkum Econometrics-kum Romba Dhooram
8) Enna Konduvandhirukkeenga ? Kalla, Kayira ? Naan Tharkolai Senjukka !
9) Ungalukku Naan Vendaamnu Kuppaila Erinjitteengala ? Illa Mathavanga Solraanga-nu Erinjitteengalaa ?
10) Naan Ungala Vilai Pesa Varala. Kalyaanam Pesa Vandhirukken

A Quantum of Solace

2010-10-02T15:01:00.000-07:00

Bunnu and I can spend hours in advanced intellect-enhancing pursuits:

Indulge in fiercely competitive "who can laugh or sneeze louder to scare away the neighbour's cat from our garden" contests
Find new ways to tweet like a bluebird and see if said bluebird tweets back at us
Come up with ultracool dance moves to jive to Uff Teri Ada

The Spouse clearly feels that my attempts are woefully inadequate. Perhaps to compensate for this, he enthusiastically set about teaching Bunnu the finer points of quantum physics, specifically the basics of the Schrodinger's Cat paradox. After explaining some rudimentary concepts to Bunnu for about five minutes, the Spouse proceeded to quiz his offspring to see what he'd learned

The Spouse: So, there's a black box having a black cat
Bunnu: OK
The Spouse: Can you tell me exactly where in the box the cat is ?
Bunnu: Was the cat being naughty to be kept in the box ?
The Spouse: First answer my question !
Bunnu: Does the cat have any baby kittens ?
The Spouse: What I am asking is ....
Bunnu: How will the cat drink milk if its stuck in the box ?
The Spouse: I give up !

Oscar award - to me for maintaining an outwardly solemn expression while bubbling with joy inside on witnessing the whole exchange. Feel thrilled and somewhat relieved that the child occasionally exhibits some of my traits

Sallu Ban Gaya Madrasi

2010-09-11T17:45:00.000-07:00

While a big ruckus has been raised over the lack of non-native heroines in South Indian movies, not much has been said about the phenomenon of Salman Khan morphing into a mishmash of the typical Astounding-Aambalai Tamizh hero and the Mucho-Magadu Telugu hero

Sallu single handedly brings the South-Indian-Hero persona to the BiMaRu Hindi Heartland, thereby causing massive trepidation in the hearts of well-heeled Bhojpuri film producers.

Wanted, Sallu's previous hit film, gave a vague inkling of things to come - but since it was a pixel-by-pixel remake of Pokiri, the Sambarization-of-Salman could easily be attributed to the demands of the storyline.

But with his latest, Dabangg, its eminently clear that Sallu's dived wholeheartedly into a vat of South-hero-polyjuice-potion

Presenting to you, unmistakable evidence of this, based on carefully watching Dabangg:

Zero multiplex-targeting hipness (the kind that inundates Farhan Akhtar/YRF films) - Check
Populated by characters who'd interpret the term "Metrosexual" to mean amorous displays in mass transit - Check
Yero always sporting mammoth-size sunglasses - Check
Yero having slicked-back over-gelled hair - Check
Yero strutting about in Police-uniform like a Paleolithic Predator - Check
Yero and yevvery other male on the premises sporting enormous handlebar moustaches - Check
Yero hitting won time equals Mango-men hitting won hundred times - Check
Punch Dialogues - Check

Yero sloshes Janta Villain-dudes with Aquafina and hisses - I yave given you a better-than-Bisleri bath, now I yam really going to take you to the cleaners

Buxom Belle Babe much leched at by all manners of masculine creatures - Check
Yero's drunken serenade, sidekicks in tow, of aforementioned Belle - Check
Mother sentiment, father sentiment, brother sentiment, wife sentiment, husband sentiment - Check
Weddings stopped in the name of honour - Check
Melodramatic scenes around the embers of burning pyres - Check
Yeroine wearing a mile-long Mangalsutra and a volcanic-crater sized Bindi to signify marital bliss - Check
Yero-Villain final bare-bodied confrontation filmed in appropriately blood-red hues with suitably dramatic violin crescendos - Check
Audience having to dust their jaws off the floor, realign suspended-disbelief and grapple with massive migraines as the end credits roll - Check

Might as well have called the film Dappanguthu

The Tale of a Bowl

2010-09-08T00:40:00.000-07:00

The bowl sits in a corner of the kitchen counter. Almost invisible because of its pale white colour save for the deep green border near its rim. Able to blend in anywhere unobtrusively, never calling out for attention, all function and no fuss.  Tenacious to show no cracks despite the absence of any special handling, quietly exuding sheer simplicity. Qualities that match the person to whom it belongs.

An ocean separates us now. As our lives diverge further over time, it gets harder to keep up the periodic attempts to reach out and communicate with the other. Will a day come when we'll have to connect using the six-degrees-of-separation technique ? A question that would have seemed unthinkable a while ago when we practically lived in (and ate out of !) each other's pockets.

I think of you every time I see the bowl. The smooth white surface reminds me of the time when you lay down on the frosty lawns of campus in your dark blue jacket and made snow angels with gay abandon, the pressure of deadlines drifting away like wisps of falling snow. The emerald green of the rim brings to mind the chartreuse Irish pendant that you treasured and brought out only for very special occasions.

The lazy splash of milk in it takes me back to the times when you would make banana milkshake for us after a pleasantly tiring evening playing racquetball. The way it rattles in the microwave makes me fondly recall the madcap, impromptu choreography we'd come up with and jive to IndiPop and Dhinchak songs, especially the Govinda and Sallu numbers with insane lyrics.

The soft clink of the spoon in the bowl is so similar to your shimmering laughter on hearing one too many awesome-awful jokes

Just like our chance meeting many moons ago, the bowl too came into my life, suddenly and unexpectedly

It was Diwali, the festival of lights.  As always, you were in a rush to do a thousand things in a single minute. You came home to sample the sweets and snacks I'd made.  Keeping with tradition, you'd got this sweet-filled bowl and left it on the counter quietly. I was too busy stuffing you with goodies and admiring your new outfit. So noticed the bowl only after you took your leave.

As fate would have it, the bowl somehow remained with me while you moved to far away lands and our meetings became irregular

I am completely sure that when you read this, you won't even remember that you once had this bowl or that you gave it to me.  That's all the more reason that I miss you.

If only I had the power to turn the clock back. I so wish that we could blissfully enjoy hot Chai in the silvery mist of a steady rain shower once more while the energetic notes of Kisi Disco Mein Jaayen and Oonchi Hai Building play in the background

Sigh.....

Blame Game

2010-09-01T00:05:00.000-07:00

Words exchanged Mano-A-Mano after various soccer practice sessions

Take 1:
The Spouse:Why were you so slow while running with the ball ?
Bunnu: Because my hand was feeling sad that it cannot run

Take 2:
The Spouse: Why did you not run fast during soccer practice ?
Bunnu: Because my favorite animal is the turtle and turtles go very slow

Take 3:
The Spouse: No matter how many times I tell you to run quickly, why do you only walk with the ball ?
Bunnu: You need to tell it to my brain Appa. If you just talk to me, my brain can't hear you

Ode to Unsubscribers

2010-08-27T12:40:00.000-07:00

You once deemed this blog a worthy read
The uptick in the reader count caused my heart to speed
Alas ! You have now chosen to unsubscribe
My sorrow at this turn I cannot describe
The mood dips and the spirit grows heavy
I seek solace in murmuring C'est la vie
Was it a whisper from your heart or a thought in your head
Or was it simply something I said

You, Me aur Murphy

2010-08-22T19:10:00.000-07:00

If you buy a season pass to a theme park during your first visit, you'll never go again during that season. Conversely, if you don't buy a season pass, you'll definitely end up going there at least one more time
The farther you are forced to park away from your destination, the more likely it is that you'll see empty parking spots nearby once you walk wearily towards it
If you somehow manage to get a parking spot very close to the entrance of a store, it will not have the item that you are looking for
The chances of milk spilling over are highest on the day the kitchen range has been painstakingly cleaned
Deep discounts will be offered on the outfit you've been carefully eyeing for months, the day after you finally buy it. If an outfit you like is on sale, it will not be available in the size you want
A web site is most likely to experience technical difficulties when you are in a tearing hurry to complete a mission-critical online transaction
Important notices will be posted on your child's classroom bulletin board only on the day that you forget to check it
There will be a series of co-workers' birthdays or other celebrations the week that you decide to go on a diet
Problems with services or appliances will usually occur at times when there is little or no customer support available
The car will definitely be low on fuel the day you are in a rush to get to an appointment

In Site

2010-08-18T16:21:00.000-07:00

I have a powerful viewpoint on matters trivial or critical
:
:
And I have the Optician's Prescription to prove it

Tamizh Dialogues Quiz 3 - The Answers

2010-08-18T07:53:00.000-07:00

Here are the answers to the latest Tamizh Dialogues Quiz.

Many Thanks to all those who responded. The winner - Hema with a score of 9/10

1) Indha Poonayum Paal Kudikkuma Nu Nenachukittirundhene Daa. Beer-ey Adikkudhey Daa

Anniyan - The joyous exclamation by Chari (Vivek) on seeing Nandini (Sada) make the leap of faith required to embrace the bucolic love and barrel chest of Appavi-lawyer Ambi (Vikram)

2) Avanga Veettla Ellam Rendu Car Nikkum. Namakku, Car Nikkara Edam Dhaan Veedey

Kaadhal Konden - The first official directorial venture of Selvaraghavan. This line is uttered Mano-A-Mano by a classmate of Divya (Sonia Agarwal) to her suitor Aadhi (Sudeep) - explaining why she is beyond their reach. The scene culminates in the Mathemagical "Adhaan 1+1 = 2+3 = 5 High Class" line

3) Bodyla Ambu. Ambula Body. Ambu Edhilerundhu Varum - Villu. Villa Yaaru Viduvaan - Raja. Paattu, Villu - Villuppaattu - Duet. Cover Pannitten. Maximum Cover Pannitten

Aboorva Sahodharargal - Janakaraj plays the bumbling Police Inspector to perfection, with much mirth being provided by his erratic ways and the puppy-like devotion of Constable Sambandham. While investigating a murder committed using a bow and arrow, he arrives at this rapid-fire conclusion based on all available facts

4) Hollandu Polandu Finlandu Englandu Icelandu - Idhellaam Suthindu Timbuktu Vazhiya Nera Indiavukku Vandhirukken.

Velaikkaaran - V.K.Ramaswamy plays a foreign-tycoon. On being mistaken by Rajini for his village-based grandfather, VKR throws this quip to prove that he has come from abroad

5) Vaada En Appan Pettha Mavane

Arindhum Ariyaamalum - One of Vishnuvardhan's decent directorial attempts - before he went all style, no substance. Kutti (Arya) menacingly greets his kinda-sorta sibling Satya (Navdeep) after coming to terms with the revelation of this weak-kneed little brother's existence. The clumsy attempts by Kutti and his gangster father Aadhinarayanan (Prakash Raj) to become close to Satya are rather hilarious

6) Neenga Normal Person Illa. Appadi Irundhirundheenganna En Kaadhala Neenga Thookki Erinjirukka Maatteenga

Kaakka Kaakka - Maya (Jyothika) confronts the stone-faced cop Anbuchelvan (Surya) in the romantic environs of a Police Canteen and accuses him of stealing her slumber, making her forget Maths problems and making her heart go pitter-patter. She finally terms him mental for not being sentimental about her pulchritude

7) Teriyaadhunna Enda Teriyaadhu Odhavakkaraimbeenga. Teriyumna Terinju Ennathada Kizhicha Sellaakkaasumbeenga

Unnaal Mudiyum Thambi - Stern music maestro Marthandampillai (Gemini Ganesan) confronts his wayward son Udayamoorthy (Kamal) and questions him as to how he got the "Bilahari "Marthandampillai title. Sonny boy, with tongue firmly in cheek, gives this "should or should not" response. Aamlate would have been proud

8) Mike-ala Pesaradhu Andha Kaalam. Mike-ala Adikkaradhu Indha Kaalam

Guru Sishyan - Rajini and Prabhu play fake ABC (er CBI) anti-corruption squad officers out to raid Manorama's house. Rajini conducts a thorough search and finds a Microphone in a cupboard. On being asked by a worried Manorama if he intends to make a speech, he fires this line in his trademark staccato Tamizh

9) Ennanga ! Peru Stella-nu Sonneenga. Madham Maariteengala ?

Run - Madhavan sheds his chocolate-boy image and becomes the runaway winner in the who-can-down-subway-shutters-fastest competition. Meera Jasmine tells him at a bus stand that her name is Stella. He later sees her at a temple, in traditional (Paavadai-Dhavani, Pottu, Jasmine flowers in her neatly plaited wig) attire. He catches her off-guard and questions her about her religious inclinations

10) Ozhunga Thaanada Irundheenga. Dhideernu Engerundhura Varradhu Indha Lovvu ?

Mounam Pesiyadhey - Ameer's first film as director, where he showcases a brooding anti-love protagonist Gautham (Surya) who eventually falls for an asinine Ammani Sandhya (Trisha). This soul-search-inducing question is asked by Gautham to his friend as he ponders how seemingly sane dudes can fall like a ton of bricks for the first available damsel

Tamizh Dialogues Quiz 3

2010-08-14T23:16:00.000-07:00

To pacify the Tamizh Makkal who rumbled on seeing the latest Hindi Dialogues Quiz post, here is a Tamizh Dialogues Quiz. The answers will be posted on Wednesday

In line with reader requests, its based only on famous films and its very easy

Guess the Tamizh film and actor(s) based on the following dialogues:

Update: At least one correct answer has been given for dialogues 1,3,6,8,9,10. For the remaining four (2,4,5,7) - please see the Clue next to the dialogue

1) Indha Poonayum Paal Kudikkuma Nu Nenachukittirundhene Daa. Beer-ey Adikkudhey Daa
2) Avanga Veettla Ellam Rendu Car Nikkum. Namakku, Car Nikkara Edam Dhaan Veedey. Clue: Soni and Sonia
3) Bodyla Ambu. Ambula Body. Ambu Edhilerundhu Varum - Villu. Villa Yaaru Viduvaan - Raja. Paattu, Villu - Villuppaattu - Duet. Cover Pannitten. Maximum Cover Pannitten
4) Hollandu Polandu Finlandu Englandu Icelandu - Idhellaam Suthindu Timbuktu Vazhiya Nera Indiavukku Vandhirukken. Clue: Rajini Film
5) Vaada En Appan Pettha Mavane. Clue: Maybe you know it, maybe you don't
6) Neenga Normal Person Illa. Appadi Irundhirundheenganna En Kaadhala Neenga Thookki Erinjirukka Maatteenga
7) Teriyaadhunna Enda Teriyaadhu Odhavakkaraimbeenga. Teriyumna Terinju Ennathada Kizhicha Sellaakkaasumbeenga. Clue: Bilahari
8) Mike-ala Pesaradhu Andha Kaalam. Mike-ala Adikkaradhu Indha Kaalam
9) Ennanga ! Peru Stella-nu Sonneenga. Madham Maariteengala ?
10) Ozhunga Thaanada Irundheenga. Dhideernu Engerundhura Varradhu Indha Lovvu ?

ODI vs T20 - The Empire Strikes Back

2010-08-13T14:54:00.000-07:00

Just saw this

In the Kaliyuga phase of MBA (Money Before Anything) Cricket, T20 is rapidly establishing itself as the ten-ton Gorilla that will ruthlessly thrash all slower variants of the game.

I'd opined earlier that Test Cricket will be the first victim. But perhaps the money from Test matches has become such a pittance when compared to One Day Internationals (ODIs), that Test Cricket is no longer a player of consequence - akin to the position of Sadanand Vishwanath when he was part of the playing XI.

So newer ways are being devised to extract the last traces of grace and dignity from this once genteel game. Now the domestic one-day matches Down Under, following the model first tested on English Soil, will follow a split-innings format with separate sets of eleven players for batting and fielding. Bonus: a complicated scoring format guaranteed to make even Banach Algebra seem like child's play.

It is perhaps fitting that the first stab in the back of traditional One Day Cricket is being dealt by the Aussies. This is after all the land that gave us colour-coded uniforms, close-up camera shots of flying bails and uprooted stumps, microphones hidden wherever possible to capture every profanity and the glittering spectacle that was the Benson and Hedges Tournament

Now I know how the elders felt when they despaired about the impact of ODIs on the popularity of Test Cricket and how they'd reminisce about certain test matches that did adequate justice to the ferocious pace of Hall or the effortless grace of Worrell

One more reason to feel ancient in this increasingly right here-right now World

Hindi Film Dialogues Quiz 2 - The Answers

2010-08-13T07:50:00.000-07:00

Here are the answers to the recent Hindi Film Dialogues Quiz

Thanks to everyone who participated. The winner is Shruti with a score of 5.5/10

1) Vaise Bhi Chor Log Chashma Nahin Pahente

Hera Pheri - Probably the only decent comedy from Priyadarshan - he of the increasingly intolerable creations. Paresh Rawal plays the hapless homeowner Baburao Ganpatrao Apte caught in the crossfire between his two tenants - the wastrel Raju (Akshay Kumar) and the bumbling bungler Shyam (Sunil Shetty)

This line is uttered by Baburao to indicate that he trusts Shyam because of his spectacular sincerity

2) Ek Ton Kapde Dhone Ko Washington Nahin Kehte Hain

Anari No.1 - Govinda dons the dual roles of conman Raju and tycoon Rahul in this slapstick laughathon with Kader Khan playing the role of KK, the conman's mentor. The conman woos a lissome lass, unaware that she is a con-artist who also happens to be the daughter of his mentor. Much mayhem ensues

This line is uttered by KK to the conman when Raju pretends to be a busy businessman who travels abroad frequently to places like NYC and Washington DC

3) Yeh Kahaan Ja Rahi Hai Do Bailon Ki Jodi Ban-Than Kar ?

Chashm-e-Buddoor - The evergreen classic, helmed by Sai Paranjpye. Farooque Shaikh, Rakesh Bedi and the Late Ravi Baswani play a trio of Delhi University students sustained by the free cigarettes supplied by the indulgent shopkeeper Lallan Miya (Saeed Jaffrey). The three students are smitten by "Miss Chamko" Deepti Naval leading to the disruption of their bucolic existence. Fake kidnappings, real kidnappings, confusions and resolutions galore abound in this gentle and witty tale

This line is mouthed by Farooque to his pals as they get ready to zoom away on their rickety scooter to liven up a dull evening

4) Abey Tu Pair Dekh Raha Hai Ya Pikchar Dekh Raha Hai ? Chal Aage Dekh !

Rangeela - Ah,the happy times when Ram Gopal Verma was known for good films, before he immolated himself in his Aaargghh. Aamir Khan plays the cool Tapori Munna who pines for the starstruck dancer Mili (Urmila Matondkar, shedding her Masoom image and her clothing with gusto - Hai Rama Ye Kya Hua !) with Jackie Shroff as the reel-life superstar Kamal Kumar bringing up the third side of this terrific triangle

The line is uttered when Munna takes Mili on a date to see a Kamal Kumar film in the theatre. As he insolently puts his feet up on the chair in front and the guy sitting there loudly complains about it, Munna brazenly queries if the other guy has come to see his feet or the film

5) Khoon Pee Jayegi ? Aisa Bol Rahi Hai Jaise Koi Nariyal Phodkar Paani Pee Jaayega

Hum - One of the last hurrahs as a traditional Hindi-Phillum Hero for Amitabh Bachchan. Most of the films that followed (notably the shudder-inducing Lal Badshah, Ajooba and Akayla) made fans fondly hope for his retirement

Tiger AB flings this quip in a drunken daze to Jummalina-Baby (Kimi Katkar) when she threatens to drink his blood to avenge her being humiliated by Tiger and Co in a crowded tavern. The reason for her fury being his singsong request for a promised mouth-to-mouth resuscitation session on a certain Friday

6) Agar Acchi Keemat Mile Toh Yeh Shyamlal Apna Aashirwad Bhi Bech Sakta Hai

Tezaab - the first (and only) good film directed by N.Chandra. The gritty tale of a naive, idealistic young fellow Mahesh (Anil Kapoor) who transforms into the cynical, world-weary gangster Munna due to an extreme makeover thanks to poor circumstances.

Anupam Kher plays the slimy, money-minded Shyamlal - the distress-inducing-dad to dancing damsel Mohini (Madhuri Dixit). He coldly utters this line when the local shopkeeper asks for Shyamlal's blessings (to marry Mohini) in return for paying fifty thousand rupees to Munna for rescuing Mohini from the clutches of notorious goon Lotiya Pathan (Kiran Kumar)

7) Life Mein Teen Cheezon Ke Peeche Kabhi Nahin Bhagna Chahiye - Bus, Train Aur Chokri

Ishq - After the stupendous success of Dil and Beta, Indra Kumar decided to go all out and make a multi-starrer with the reigning (circa 1997) royalty of Bollywood - Ajay Devgan, Aamir Khan, Kajol and Juhi Chawla. The result was a sordid saga of rich girl-poor boy and rich boy-poor girl. Massive doses of melodrama and screechy dialogues ensured that the movie was a flop. The only good thing to come out of this film was the unquestionably brilliant Mr.Lova Lova song featuring a Shahenshah-wannabe Johnny Lever.

This line is uttered by Love-Guru Aamir to Lovestruck-Chela Ajay as he pines over Kajol

8) Jab Yeh Dhai Kilo Ka Haath Kisi Pe Padta Hai, Toh Aadmi Uthta Nahin, Uth Jaata Hai

Damini - Raj Kumar Santoshi's trademark hard-hitting, strong-dialogue-filled women-centric drama. Meenakshi Sheshadri, in the role of her lifetime, plays the titular Damini. The obedient Bahurani turns into an unwitting crusader after being an eyewitness to a gruesome attack by her in-laws. Hubby Rishi Kapoor skilfully exudes the dilemma of a man caught between spousal love and filial loyalty.

But it takes the omnipotent Punjab-Da-Puttar attitude of drunken lawyer Govind (Sunny Deol) to take matters into his own 2.5kg hands, verbally thrash his legal adversary (Amrish Puri) in court, make Rishi say the mushy three little words to his wife in the courtroom in front of judge, jury and cheering bystanders - basically doing all it takes to ensure a happy ending as the end credits roll

This line is uttered by Sunny when he effortlessly saves Damini from a sad-looking set of evildoers. The villains are summarily dispatched to the ground and Chote Paaji guarantees them permanent upward mobility courtesy his robust limbs

9) Cake Khane Ke Liye Hum Kahin Bhi Jaa Sakte Hain

Dil Chahta Hai - Saif Ali Khan finally gets a role to break away from his loverboy second-fiddle image (deservedly gained through weak performances in films like Yeh Dillagi, Main Khiladi Tu Anadi and Kachche Dhaage). He easily slips into the skin of slacker Samir, who silently suffers the tyranny of his girlfriend and is subjected to merciless teasing by his two pals Akash (a cocky Aamir Khan) and Sid (the my-jaw-epitomizes-cud-chewing Akshaye Khanna)

Samir utters this instantly-identifiable-with line when the three friends surprise gorgeous Diva Dimple with a birthday cake

10) Ghar Mein Biwi Nahin Hai, Jeb Mein Beedi Nahin Hai, Maachis Ka Kya Karoge ? Jao Aish Karo

Baap Numbri Beta Dus Numbri - Kader Khan and Shakti Kapoor play a father-son swindler duo, out to con all and sundry out of their meager possessions. One-liner zingers abound in this inspired dramedy.

This line is uttered by Kader Khan as he spins a fake yarn and manages to extract the last Beedi and only matchbox from a poor Postman

Mere Sawalon Ka Jawab Do

2010-08-09T17:12:00.000-07:00

Its been a while since I did the last Hindi Film Dialogues Quiz. Here's another one. The answers will be posted this Friday

Guess the film and actors based on the following dialogues:

1) Vaise Bhi Chor Log Chashma Nahin Pahente
2) Ek Ton Kapde Dhone Ko Washington Nahin Kehte Hain
3) Yeh Kahaan Ja Rahi Hai Do Bailon Ki Jodi Ban-Than Kar ?
4) Abey Tu Pair Dekh Raha Hai Ya Pikchar Dekh Raha Hai ? Chal Aage Dekh !
5) Khoon Pee Jayegi ? Aisa Bol Rahi Hai Jaise Koi Nariyal Phodkar Paani Pee Jaayega
6) Agar Acchi Keemat Mile Toh Yeh Shyamlal Apna Aashirwad Bhi Bech Sakta Hai
7) Life Mein Teen Cheezon Ke Peeche Kabhi Nahin Bhagna Chahiye - Bus, Train Aur Chokri
8) Jab Yeh Dhai Kilo Ka Haath Kisi Pe Padta Hai, Toh Aadmi Uthta Nahin, Uth Jaata Hai
9) Cake Khane Ke Liye Hum Kahin Bhi Jaa Sakte Hain
10) Ghar Mein Biwi Nahin Hai, Jeb Mein Beedi Nahin Hai, Maachis Ka Kya Karoge ? Jao Aish Karo

Phrase-Saving Tactics

2010-08-08T18:30:00.000-07:00

Scene: Bunnu is busy setting up his train tracks and building a railway bridge. Suddenly there is a loud crash and the bridge collapses

Bunnu: What the Hell !
Me: What ? What did you just say ?
Bunnu: Nothing
Me: I heard that. You said something
Bunnu: I said "Water is Healthy"
Me: I don't think so
Bunnu: I did. I said it to my trains because the bridge fell down since it was thirsty

Taap reasons to see the film Kalavani

2010-08-04T15:28:00.000-07:00

The innovative use of numeric symbology (LC112) in romantic declarations of togetherness. Even Robert Langdon can't beat this !
The raw, manic energy and barely contained fury of the antagonist - Thirumurugan deserves a big round of applause for his amazing performance as the hotheaded Ilango. One that makes Arikki, the protagonist, pale in comparison
The dialogues - the sparkling humour and witty repartees galore are a treat to the senses. Plus there are no Gabdun-style bunch dialaaks
Ganja Karuppu - the role of the town busybody, Panjaayathu Sozhanaattaar, is tailor-made for this oft-underrated comedian. His expressions, body language and dialogue delivery are outrageously outstanding. Especially the manner in which he says "Naadagatha Aarambichittanga" at various occasions
Saranya's heartwarming turn as the swindling hero's mother - refreshingly empty of Thaaikkulam-sentiments, tears or melodrama
The hero's sidekicks - well-etched individual characterizations, with names like Paambu Nagaraj to boot - very genuine performances
The fitting use of '70s-'80s Ilayaraja songs as part of the background score - something which has become de rigueur in gritty village movies of recent times
The absence of gory bloodshed - despite several instances of Vettiya Madichu Katti Aruvaala Thookkaradhu
The irreverently unapologetic happy ending
Non-Tamizh readers, I regret to inform you that Gautham Menon has acquired the rights to remake this film in all other Indian languages. Before this catastrophe comes to fruition, please grab the nearest subtitled copy of the original and see it

The Betrayal

2010-08-01T18:20:00.000-07:00

The heart trembled as I first lay my eyes upon you - was it because you stood out even in a crowd ? I fell for you then and there, undeterred by the presence of my better half.

You came home one fateful weekend. I fought an oppressive internal battle - overjoyed one moment that my unspoken wish to have you near had been met and distressed the next moment that I should stay true to my vows and resist your beguiling allure

You remained quiet, impassive, unaware of my torment. Your silence only added to your potent appeal.

True to Wilde's quote, I could resist anything - except temptation. Proximity only fanned the flames of forbidden attraction

My control lasted but a little while - interminable moments of eternal want. I became adept at steadfastly tuning out the mind's desperate pleas to maintain sanity and balance . There was no room for logic here. Morality had been overpowered by the consuming urge to heed to the siren call of desire

I decided to ignore my inner voice, throw caution to the winds and live for the here and now. You were too near, too accessible. I could not allow myself to lose this opportunity

I lied to the Spouse that I had to take care of some office work that would keep me busy late into the night. Waited with bated breath until everyone else went to sleep and darkness enveloped the house. Quivering with anticipation, I crossed the short distance between us. I was giddy with the exhilaration that the barriers between us were down, haste making my movements clumsy

I finally let down my guard, unaware of the soft click of the light and the horrified, accusatory expression on the Spouse's face as realization dawned upon him

His words stung, the truth in them unmistakable

"You knew that I got that Chocolate Truffle Cake for tomorrow's Office Potluck. How could you have a go at that ?! What happened to your no-chocolate-for-one-week resolution ??"

Preaching To The Choir

2010-07-28T00:08:00.000-07:00

Recent conversation at Home

Bunnu: Do you know what I talked to my friend today ?
Me: What ?
Bunnu: I told him all the things about my blog
Me: You don't have a blog
Bunnu: I do. For a loooooong time
Me: What do you write in it ?
Bunnu: About my trains. I wrote about an engine which wears glasses. His name is Whiff. But my friend said engines don't wear glasses.
Me: That's OK.
(A few moments of silence)
Bunnu: Amma, can I write about what we talk ?

Darna Zaroori Hai

2010-07-23T16:19:00.000-07:00

Tagged by UTBT to list five things that induce fear in me and to also mention some books helpful in dealing with fear

I could probably list five million (I am a Scaredy Cat - but can't even say that since I am scared of cats) - am listing only five shiver-inducing thoughts below as per the tag rules:

1) Test Cricket will die a quick, unnoticed death

First there was Test cricket, then 60-overs One-day cricket, then 50-overs One-day cricket, now T20. Cricket is moving in the direction of the reverse big-bang - back to the point of an infinitely dense singularity. A day will soon come where each game will be reduced to a single-delivery-farce, with players chosen at random by the Twitterati, to decide the winner

2) Brandon Sanderson will make an uber-mess out of Tarmon Gai'don and disastrously end WoT

The Creator's masterful epic that kept generations of fans eagerly waiting to see The Dragon's blood on the rocks of Shayol Ghul is under serious peril - Gray Men taking the form of words in Sanderson's halting continuations of RJ's unfinished work - slowly and inexorably extinguishing the light from this series

3) The following joints will down their shutters or worse, lose their excellence due to a management change:

Frontier Dhaba - the ghetto-like gastronomical paradise, now plodding along in Wazirpur after being forced out of its pre-independence-era location near Panchkuian Road in Connaught Place. Saari-Dilli-Mein-world-famous for its Kachoris, Samosas and Gulab Jamuns
Paranthe Wali Gali, Chandni Chowk, Old Delhi - the dingy conditions and the dubious clientele that permeate the eateries in this dusty, narrow bylane are more than compensated by the out-of-the-world taste of their signature item. Their Paranthas are smallish, round, dripping-with-desi-ghee and are best enjoyed on chilly winter mornings with Khatti Dahi, Tareeli Alu Subzi and Aam-Ka-Achaar as accompaniments. A brisk walk from Lal Kila Bus Terminal to this street is sufficient to work up an appetite sufficient to justify the mouth-watering wares available in these neglected nether regions of the Capital
Sri Vasavi Sweets, Thillai Nagar, Trichy - melt-in-your-mouth Mysorepaks, drool-worthy Badam Halwa and much, much more - enough to keep a dedicated fleet of foodies busy forever
The hole-in-the-wall Paalgova Shop in Nandi Koil Street, Trichy - the best Paal Gova in the land

4) Someone will come and offer me the choice between the red pill and the blue pill - and I will choose the red pill. Hope better sense prevails and I choose to obey Jessop's "You can't handle the truth" rule and choose to take the blue pill

5) Gautham Menon will make a sequel to Vinnaithandi Varuvaya to explain how Karthik got Jesse's US phone number - and have a "Adutha Padathula Solren" dialogue in it to make a series of films based on VTV with Simbu as the protagonist in each one

Here are a few books related to overcoming Fear:

1) Go Away Big Green Monster - by Ed Emberley

This book works very well in helping children to visualize the systematic eradication of each facet that one fears in a monster

2) Stories of Real Men - by Zori Balayan

I read this book during my childhood - a stark, factual recounting of how specific people dealt with challenges in the Siberian Tundra

The tag states that I must tag five other people. I welcome anyone who reads this to do the tag if they like

Loco Motive

2010-07-21T01:00:00.000-07:00

Multitasking madness in full steam in the kitchen. Bunnu comes up to me eagerly

Me: Guess what I am cooking ?
Bunnu: I don't know. But it smells like Pugai Vandi Vasanai (the smell of a train)

Pondering if I should :

a) Feel happy that Bunnu knows the Tamizh word for Train
b) Be miffed by this blatant nose-cut to my culinary skills
c) Lavishly bribe Bunnu so that he doesn't repeat this in front of his Dad

Analyze This

2010-07-17T16:55:00.000-07:00

Post-soccer class conversation

The Spouse: Bunnu, why did you walk so slowly with the ball, while the other kids were running ?
Bunnu: Because of my imagination
The Spouse: What ?
Bunnu: I did it since my imagination asked me to go slow

Telugu Cinema Dialogues Quiz - The Answers

2010-07-16T14:28:00.000-07:00

Thanks to everyone who responded to this quiz

Here are the answers

1) Knowledge Is Divine Ante Gyaanam Wine Lantidi. Entha Thaagithe Antha Balam. (Knowledge is Divine means that knowledge is like wine. The more you imbibe it, the stronger you get)

Athadu - Bramhanandam's inspired interpretation of the "'Knowledge is Divine" phrase. One of the many fine lines in this assassin-with-the-morals-of-gold-themed film whose dialogues are courtesy the supremely gifted Trivikram Srinivas

2) Yuddham Ante Shatruvuni Champadam Kaadhu. Odinchadam (Wars are not won by killing one's adversaries, but by vanquishing them completely)

Jalsa - Mahesh's voice-over indicating the Sun Tzu-ness of Power Star Pawan Kalyan. Right after PK does a "Kill Bill" style sword based Shura Samhaaram of a scowling Rahul Dev

3) Kanti Choopu Lakshyam Meedhe Undaali (One's eye should always be on the target)

Magadheera - Forget cooing doves, real warriors conduct their romance over archery lessons. Instructions mouthed ever-so-woodenly by Udaigad chief-guard Bhairava (the my-armour-is-so-heavy-it-hurts Ram Charan Teja) to the simpering princess Mitravinda (the my-ornate-gown-is-so-heavy-it-hurts Kajal Aggarwal)

4) Babu Maheshu Ekkadunnavu Naayana (Mahesh, ma man, where art thou)

Ashta Chemma - a Wilde-ly madcap comedy based on "The Importance of Being Mahesh". Line uttered by a desperate and distraught Srinivas Avasarala after failing miserably at finding a suitable boy named "Mahesh" for the Mahesh Babu-obsessed Swati

5) Nannaki Nannammaki Telisi Chesukundaama, Leda Dongatananga Chesukundaama (Shall we get married with the knowledge of your father and grandma or shall we elope in secret and get married)

Geethanjali - Nagarjuna generously provides several marital options over the phone, ostensibly just to future-lady-love Girija - but his words are dutifully yelled out to all and sundry by Girija's sister, much to the heroine's consternation. The first of many typical-Mani Ratnam romantic moments in films

6) Avineethiki Aakalekkuva. Aakaliki Aaratamekkuva (Injustice hungers to propagate itself further. Acute hunger has a great longing)

Leader - Tanikella Bharani, playing the CM's trusted aide, ponders on the relative influence and power of injustice vs poverty. One among many hard-hitting dialogues in this Sekhar Kammula-helmed set piece, also RaNa Daggubati's debut film

7) Suddenga Vaadilo Hero Choosanu. Guts Unna Kurrallu Indialo Unnaru. (I suddenly saw a hero in him. India still has a few gutsy young men left)

Ek Niranjan - Sonu Sood plays a comic villain hell bent on emulating a Cinema Hero. Sood's Johnny Bhai persona utters this line on being questioned by sidekick Brammaji as to why he let "Amma Ledu Nanna Ledu" bounty-hunter hero Prabhas leave his lair unscathed

8) Nenu Nee Chellini Ishatapadla. Nenu Ishtapadindhi Nee Chellaindhi. (I did not like your sister. The one I like turned out to be your sister)

Bhadra - Ravi Teja offers this rapid fire logical salvo to his best buddy, who's rather upset that RT fell flat for his sister (Meera Jasmine plays the comely lass in question) just by seeing a video recording of hers

9) Puli Nee Intiki Vachindha Leda, Mee Amma Adaviki Vellindhi. (Has the tiger come to your house or not ? Your Mom has gone to the forest)

Gamyam - The name is Seenu, Gaali Seenu. Allari Naresh did a phenomenal job as the sidekick ever-ready to spout witty one-liners in this Telugu rehash of The Motorcycle Diaries. He makes this quip when a guy (holding up traffic despite the protests of those inconvenienced by his actions) claims to be so brave that he's practically a Puli Bidda (Tiger Cub)

10) Nenu Champanu. Chaavuni Parichayam Chesthaa. (I do not kill anyone. I simply facilitate an introduction to death)

Sainikudu - Mahesh Babu, in his medical student Avatar, sets to cleanse the dirt in society, one evildoer at a time. He utters this line to justify his Dr.Evil ways - he uses effective techniques to literally scare bad guys to death, instead of killing them. A colossal flop from Guna Sekhar's stable, especially jarring for The Prince of Tollywood after the stupendous success of Puri Jagannadh's Pokiri

Ai Baboi ! Malli Quizzu

2010-07-15T12:52:00.000-07:00

For my two longtime Telugu readers (and anyone else who'd like to take a shot !) - who have patiently read through my Tamizh and Hindi Cinema Quiz Posts

Ee Telugu Cinema Dialogsu Choodandi. Anni Chaala Suluvuga Unnayi

Thondaraga Cinema Peru, Actors Peru Commentslo Cheppandi

Knowledge Is Divine Ante Gyaanam Wine Lantidi. Entha Thaagithe Antha Balam. Clue: Bramhanandam
Yuddham Ante Shatruvuni Champadam Kaadhu. Odinchadam
Kanti Choopu Lakshyam Meedhe Undaali
Babu Maheshu Ekkadunnavu Naayana
Nannaki Nannammaki Telisi Chesukundaama, Leda Dongatananga Chesukundaama
Avineethiki Aakalekkuva. Aakaliki Aaratamekkuva
Suddenga Vaadilo Hero Choosanu. Guts Unna Kurrallu Indialo Unnaru. Clue: Brammaji
Nenu Nee Chellini Ishatapadla. Nenu Ishtapadindhi Nee Chellaindhi. Clue: Ravi Teja
Puli Nee Intiki Vachindha Leda, Mee Amma Adaviki Vellindhi. Clue: Allari Naresh
Nenu Champanu. Chaavuni Parichayam Chesthaa. Clue: Prince

Terms Of Endearment

2010-07-14T21:38:00.000-07:00

In gentler times and simpler climes, a scornful scolding or a disdainful dressing-down did not require the use of bleeped-out swear words or cringe-inducing crudeness

The art of delivering an expletive-free, stinging, sarcastic verbal lashing, peppered liberally with witty words and apt analogies, is second nature to reprimanders from earlier generations.

In order to revive an almost-lost art (or to save it from certain death), I present to you, a collection of such commonly (at least among Tanjavur and Tiruchi natives) used Ashtottara Naamaavalis in Tamizh with translation/transliteration.

The following words/phrases were heard frequently during years past. But these are rarely used nowadays, often replaced by meek, docile, unworthy, anemic and decidedly inferior English terms

Common Critical Words:

Abacharit: Lit. Meaning - Unknown. Usage - One who shows unquestionable signs of idiocy
Abhishtu: Lit. Meaning - Unknown. Usage- One who is slow/dull. Note - The only word in this list to figure in a Tamizh film song (Bambai Mami featuring Radhika/Sathyaraj from Villadhi Villan)
Asamanjam: Lit. Meaning - Slow on the uptake. Usage - One who is slow to act/react
Biscothu Pasanga: Lit. Meaning - The Biscuit Dudes. Usage - An uncouth/unethical set of men
Brammahathi/Sozha Brammahathi/Sozham: Lit. Meaning: Afflicted with the fearsome curse of having killed a Brahmana. Long story behind this one. The Brammahathi Dosham befell a Chola King who took recourse in the Siva temple at Tiruvadamarudoor in Tanjore District of Tamil Nadu. Because of the sanctity of the divine, the Brammahathi was not allowed to enter the temple and had to wait for the King at the front entrance of the temple. The King escaped via another temple entrance. The Brammahathi waited (and is still considered to be waiting) for the King to come back. Usage - one who sits in the same place doing absolutely nothing/one who is easily fooled
Mada Saambrani: Lit. Meaning - Unintelligent piece of incense. Usage - One who is dull/ignorant
Mooshundai: Lit. Meaning - Unknown. Usage - One who displays ineptitude
Mutta Kuruvi/Mutta Paya: Lit. Meaning - Unintelligent sparrow/Unintelligent boy. Usage - One who is unmistakably ignorant about even basic things
Neer Vaazhaikkaai: Lit. Meaning - Water Plantain. Usage - to refer to those who consider Fish to be akin to aquatic plantains and hence Vegetarian (aka Bengalis). Credit goes to my friend KS's father for coining this one.
Panchanadhi: Lit. Meaning - The Five Rivers. Usage - to refer to folks exhibiting stereotypical Punjabi qualities (spirited/colourful/uninhibited)
Panja Paradesi: Lit. Meaning - Miserly Foreigner. Usage - One who exudes extreme miserliness
Soplaangi: Lit. Meaning - Weakling. Usage - One who is rather weak
Thadimaadu: Lit. Meaning - Well fed cow. Usage - A grown person who prefers cud-chewing to doing anything worthwhile

Common Disdainful Phrases

Araippanam Kuduthu Aadachonna Oru Panam Kuduthu Oyachollanum. Lit. Meaning - If it takes half a rupee to make someone dance, then it would take one rupee to make them stop. Usage - folks who are difficult to contain/silence once they get started
Appathula Nei Modakkaradhu. Lit. Meaning - Like Ghee floating in an Appam (fried sweet). Usage - One who is very affluent
Thavidu Thinga Oyyaram: Lit. Meaning - Showing airs to eat hay powder. Usage - Being fussy about the simplest of things
Poroda Thingara Maattukku Pudungi Poatta Aaguma: Lit. Meaning - It would be insufficient to give a few bales of hay to a cow used to feeding directly from the haystack. Usage - When demand far exceeds supply
Arachavanukku Aattukkal, Suttavanukku Dosakkal: Lit. Meaning - The guy who ground the batter gets the stone grinder, the guy who made the Dosas gets the Dosa pan. Usage - Those who do the actual work do not get the credit
Pichaikku Vandha Brahmanaa, Perungaaya Choppa Paathiya: Lit. Meaning - Asking the alms-seeker if he knows the whereabouts of the Asafoetida container. Usage - Linking two unconnected events just by virtue of their temporal/spatial proximity
Udayavar Unda Kattikka Azharaar, Lingam Panchaamirdham Kekkaradhu. Lit. Meaning - The main deity lacks offerings and a cloth covering, but the secondary Lingam asks for Panchamrutham. Usage - Demands that greatly exceed available means
Edatha Kudutha Madatha Pudippa. Lit. Meaning - Give some space and they'll take the whole Mutt. Usage - Give an inch and they'll take a mile
Mayirulla Seemaatti. Vaari Mudiyalaam, Valakkondaiyum Podalaam, Edakkondaiyum Podalaam. Lit. Meaning - The long haired lady can tie her hair up, put it up on the right side or put it up on the left side. Usage - One who is very well-off (monetarily or in any other aspect) can afford to do anything
Engappa Kudhirukkulla Illa. Lit. Meaning - My father is not in the rice paddy container. Usage - Revealing something which should have been kept secret
Oorla Kalyanam Maarla Sandhanam. Lit. Meaning - there's an unknown wedding in the city, but there's sandalwood paste on the chest. Usage: Feeling happy about events that have no bearing to the self
Kanji Varadhappa Na Enga Varadhappa. Lit. Meaning - If someone says Kanji Varadappa (referring to the Kanchipuram temple's Varadaraja Deity), you ask where its coming from (Kanji Varadhappa also means that the breakfast gruel is coming). Usage - Completely misunderstanding what is being said
Kurudana Paathu Raja Muzhi Muzhinna. Lit. Meaning - Asking a blind man to stare like a King. Usage - Asking a person to do something way beyond their capacity or capability
Vidiya Vidiya Ramayanam Kettu Seethaikku Raaman Chittappa. Lit. Meaning - Listen to the Ramayana until dawn and conclude that Rama was Seetha's uncle. Usage - one who jumps to the wrong conclusions
Kedakkarathellam kedakkattum Kezhavanai Thookki Manaiyila Vei. Lit. Meaning - Drop everything and place the old man at the altar. Usage - One who neglects vital tasks and focuses on unimportant or irrelevant things
Ellu Thaan Ennaikku Kayarathu Na Elippuzhukkai Edhukkaaga Kaayanum. Lit. Meaning - If the sesame seeds are waiting to be converted to Oil, what is the Rat Dropping waiting for ? Usage - When someone gets hot and bothered over things that have no bearing to them
Seelai Illainu Chinnaaiya Pakka Pona Eechampaaya Suthindu Edhirla Vandhalaam. Lit. Meaning - On going to see one's aunt to borrow a Saree, saw her clad only in a Palm-Leaf-Carpet. Usage - the futility of trying to seek resources from someone in a worse situation than oneself
Kooraiyila Kozhi Pudikka Mudiyala Vaanathula Vaikundam Popporanaam. Lit. Meaning - Unable to catch a rooster on the roof, but plans to take flight to Sri Vaikuntam. Usage - One who cannot do simple tasks but talks of doing extraordinary feats
Vannaanukku Vannaathi Mela Aasai, Vannaathiku Kazhudhai Mela Aasai. Lit. Meaning - The washerman likes the washerwoman, the washerwoman likes the donkey. Usage - The absence of reciprocity (of affection) and the presence of transitivity in relationships
Vecha Kudumi Saracha Mottai. Lit. Meaning - Either a full tuft of hair, or a completely shaven head. Usage - one who flip flops between two extremes
Thaan Pudicha Moyalukku Moone Kaal. Lit. Meaning - The rabbit one has caught has only three feet. Usage - one who is extremely stubborn
Velakkumaathu Kattaikku Pattu Kunjalam. Lit. Meaning - tying a silk hair ornament to a cleaning brush. Usage - Unnecessarily primping up a completely inappropriate/incongruous item
Koyavanukku Palanaal Thadiyanukku Orunaal. Lit. Meaning - Many days for the potter to make a pot, but only a day for the ruffian to break the pot. Usage - easily destroying something that has been painstakingly created
Sundaikkai Kaappanam Somakkooli Araippanam. Lit. Meaning - Only a quarter rupee for the vegetables, but half a rupee to carry them. Usage - spending more on incidental expenses than on the main item
Munna Ponaa Muttum Pinna Vandha Udhaikkum. Lit. Meaning - Get head-butted from the front or get kicked from the back. Usage - Double-edged sword, Devil and the deep blue sea scenario
Saami Varam Koduthaalum Poosaari Varam Kodukkalaye. Lit. Meaning - The deity has given the blessings but the priest has not. Usage - situations where major hurdles have been crossed but the minor ones are proving to be thorny
Kazhudhai Thenju Katterumbaachaam. Lit. Meaning - The donkey got worn down to an ant. Usage - working to the level of wearing oneself out on a futile task
Sozhiyan Kudumi Summa Virithaaduma. Lit. Meaning - Will the wily man's hair tuft dance for nothing ? Usage - Certain events/trait displays are for significant reasons only
Thaan Kettadhum Illaamal Chandrapushkaraniyum Sethu Keduthaan. Lit. Meaning - Not only did he get spoilt, but also spoilt the Chandrapushkarani (a pond at the Srirangam temple near Tiruchi). Usage - One rotten apple spoils the barrel
Aalayilla Oorukku Eluppappoo Sakkarai. Lit. Meaning - The flower of the palm tree is the sweetest thing in a sugar-less place. Usage - In the land of the blind, the one-eyed is the King scenario

Shady Statements

2010-07-13T11:50:00.000-07:00

Scene 1 - We are at the park on a sunny afternoon

Bunnu: Where are all the squirrels ?
Me: Its too hot. They must be resting in the treetops
Bunnu: No Amma. I know where they are
Me: Where ?
Bunnu: They have gone to buy sunglasses from purchase kadai (shop)

Scene 2 - Dinner table conversation

Bunnu: How old I am ?
Me: Four and a half
Bunnu: No, am only four. Don't say such wrong truths Amma !

Guest Post on the Gender Stereotypes Tag

2010-07-12T12:21:00.000-07:00

I'd asked my friend KS to do the Gender stereotypes tag.

Since her response couldn't fit within the char. limit for comments, I am presenting her viewpoint as a guest post. The following is a direct cut & paste of her email on this subject

[begin-ramble]

Gender stereotypes are relative and are defined by our own perspectives of what WE think the world around us expects out of us. So, while devouring chocolates maybe deemed feminine by some, others may think eating tikkis and golgappas/puchkas is a female thing. But, seriously, since when did food get associated with gender?

Here's my list.

Really, I cannot think of even a single gender-stereotype-defying thing about myself. Mostly, I think I'm a conformist (and a mediocre one at that).
- I love to shop but love to shop ALONE (online shopping was tailor-made for me). I love clothes, handbags, shoes - you know the usual stuff. don't have much of an eye for jewelery.
- i like to look at well dressed and good looking people - men/women, even dogs.
- I like cooking (doing dishes comes as a package deal but I find it stress-reliving provided there's warm running water).
- I like watching sci-fi, and action flicks. Don't care much for chick-flicks but can tolerate them. I just can't handle horrors/tear-jerkers and sad/dysfunctional family dramas. I don't think I qualify to be in any gender bucket here.
- When I'd the time and interest, I used to prefer fiction to non-fiction. And classics to the newer paperbacks. I've not done any reading lately. I associate women with classics-readers.
- I wouldn't call myself a fanatical sports watcher. My interests in watching sports reflect my dad's preferences than my own. Dad liked football and cricket and that influenced each one of us. So, watching the world cup has more to do with nostalgia than an active interest. Had I really been keen I'd closely follow the premier league and the UEFA/champions series and serie a etc - i don't do any of that. Does that break a gender stereotype? I doubt it I don't think watching or not watching sports breaks a gender stereotype. A lot of women who claim to be cricket fans wont know the difference between a hook and a pull or between mid-on and square-leg and mid-wicket
- i enjoy hiking and running and picnics with plenty of food to eat. no gsd there either.
- I can assemble furniture and have done it many times in the past. That said, i think some people are more competent at it than i am and if there's one such person at home I'd rather have them do it.
- i recently developed an interest in sewing and crafts. don't know if it is a passing thing, a mid-life crisis of sorts.

So, all-in-all, i don't think i've any characteristic that defies or defines GS. Sorry to disappoint.

Based on office break room small-talk, I think men talk more about technical and business stuff. Women spend more time discussing family. Everyone likes gossip. Both like to talk about food though not many indian men like to talk about the preparation methods. Sorry about generalizing - I may just be hanging out with the wrong crowd.

That said, most of the comments that I read in this post and a few other places, don't really defy GS. At least not in my opinion. What most people list as GSD seems to be "poeTTI" (tamil) with men than defying any stereotypes. Or, at best, a desire to keep oneself up to date on current affairs - that helps with small-talk - i confess i'm guilty of that (like DATA).

IMO, you're defying GS (as a woman), if (in no specific order):

- you're good with fixing things around the house.

- you are a priest at a south indian hindu temple

- you are a traffic policewoman in india (you don't have to be a kiran bedi to qualify).

- you are a crane operator or a truck driver

- you're an engine or a bus driver in india.

- you're a competent surgeon in a non-gynae related field.

- you're an engineer in the true sense (not a software programmer)

- you're a mathematician/physicist or in sciences (again not in software)

- if you can motivate yourself to actively PLAY ANY sports in india.

The list goes on... but i hope you get my drift.

Overall, I think this entire topic reeks of immaturity. Sorry, I don't have to be polite since I don't have a blog :-)

I'm just a humble (okay, not-so-humble) commenter.

[end-ramble]

Walkin' On Sunshine Baby !

2010-07-11T23:00:00.000-07:00

Muller wins the Golden Boot Award

and

Forlan wins the Golden Ball Award

Balle Balle Gidde Che Kara de Balliye
Aaja Nachle Ji Aaja Nachle

Chak De Phatte !!

Friends, Frustrated Viewers and Fuming Fans

2010-07-11T15:19:00.000-07:00

Lend me your tears

I come before you not to praise yesterday's match, but to bury it under the avalanche of brilliant moments from today's final game of FIFA'10

The two teams in this final game vied with each other to show vital aspects of this beautiful game to watchers the world over.

Here is a brief list for those who missed this memorable match:

1) Facilitate the referees to earn their pay by having them run around constantly and stretch their lung capacity by blowing their whistles continuously - thereby masking the drone of the Vuvuzelas
2) Make viewers wonder which sport is being played on the field. Its Kabaddi, its Kickboxing, its Sumo wrestling - no its the Super-match of FIFA'10 !!
3) Clearly and explicitly show their dependence on a single team member (the Dutch on Robben, the Spaniards on Torres) to make anything worthwhile happen. Compel the injured Fernando Torres to hobble onto the field in the last minutes of extra time to fashion the sole effective conversion of this game. Gallantly and kindly allow him to drop to the ground due to his nagging hamstring problems once his usefulness was over
4) Prevent fans or scorekeepers from having to bother about the number of goals scored or which team was in the lead at any given moment
5) Allow the referee to know the names/jersey numbers of the maximum number of players in each side (especially the Dutch) by having Yellow cards given out at regular intervals
6) Challenge the substitution abilities of coaches - by having regular and substitute players get yellow cards in record time
7) To compensate for the lack of footballing abilities - display latent dramatic prowess by finding newer and better ways to writhe in agony on the ground or put on innocent, "butter won't melt in my mouth" expressions after blatant fouls
8) As befitting contenders for the Golden Boot award, Robben & Villa showed increasingly stunning techniques to fumble the simplest of free kicks and open-goal "sitting duck goalie" situations
9) Prevent fans from having to endure the additional torment of a penalty shootout
10) Provide viewers with an overwhelming "Thank Goodness That This Is Over" feeling instead of sadness or regret

It is not that I hated the utter ineptitude displayed by the Spaniards any less, just that I hated the brutal tactics of the Dutch more

The only piece of poetic justice in this entire travesty of a final:

Neither Villa nor Robben could avail of a penalty shootout to increase their goal tally beyond five in this tournament - a sacrilege which would have enabled either of them to snatch the Golden Boot from Muller and Forlan by noxious, undeserved and utterly unpalatable means

The Revenge Of The Fallen

2010-07-10T22:42:00.000-07:00

The penultimate game of FIFA'10 - unquestionably the best game of this tournament. There is no way that the final game will be able to eclipse this one

Germany and Uruguay played the game as it should be - no defensive tactics or clinical set pieces. Classy, instinctive, pacey, earnest, attacking, for-the-love-of-the-game football at its best.

Ninety three minutes of sheer magic - a poignant ballet on the field, the momentum see-sawing this way and that - never completely allowing any one team to dominate or be dominated - the ultimate treat for the true fan. The flurry of goals was the icing on this delectable cake. The goal scoring alternating between the two teams - a furious, fierce tempo on a rain drenched field with the ground adding a dampened bounce to the ever moving ball.

Luis Suarez will probably be haunted forever by the two easy opportunities that he missed - fumbles too costly in a game this close - fumbles that ultimately cost his team the match

It is only fitting that the race for the Golden Boot stands tied between Muller and Forlan

Thomas Muller, all of twenty, the ultimate find of this World Cup. The Bayern Munich striker has come into his own in just these few games. A must-watch player in the Bundesliga and at FIFA'2014 in Brazil

Diego Forlan, carrying the twin burdens of his family's football legacy and the expectations of an entire nation desperate to bury the ghosts of glories past and forge a new Uruguayan footballing identity. Deftly handling the mantles of team Captain and defense-destroyer-in-chief. He gave as much as any human being could - despite injury and illness, practically playing on one leg in this match. His Tandava Nritya midair virtuoso goal to take Uruguay to a 2-1 lead was simply stunning.

The free kick awarded to Uruguay in the dying seconds of this game was just one of the many dramatic, tension-filled and thrilling moments in this memorable match. As Forlan stood to take the shot, as the wall of German defenders squirmed in apprehension - the heart stopped, the brain went blank and time stood still. It all seemed to happen in slow motion - Forlan's foot connecting with the ball in a well-aimed kick, the ball curling past the heads of the German defense wall, inching towards the goalie - only to fall just a wee-bit short, hitting the bar - followed almost immediately by the final whistle signifying a 3-2 German victory

The expressionless look on Forlan's face conveyed more than any expression could ever do. The dawning realization that this was perhaps the last shot taken by Forlan at a World Cup - a Swan Song of mourning. Bravo ! Bravo !

This was the true final. Tomorrow's game is just the perfunctory rubber-stamp signifying the end of this tournament. There is no way that the Dutch or the Spaniards will come anywhere close to the brilliance of today's game

There is a heartfelt quote by one of the King's closest advisers in The Prisoner of Zenda - "Heaven Does Not Always Make The Right Man King" - this is fully applicable to the two teams who played today

Germany and Uruguay are the real champions. Tomorrow's score-topper is just the FIFA Cup Holder for the four years to come

Prince of Inertia

2010-07-10T11:16:00.000-07:00

The Spouse took Bunnu to his first soccer class.

Bunnu was not too keen, preferring to stand and observe the other kids

Enthusiasm levels picked up when he came to know the coach's name - Thomas

The coach asked all the kids to dribble the ball from one end of the field to the goal post at the other end to see who would be the fastest to score a goal. All the other kids started dribbling in earnest at the coach's whistle

Bunnu took the ball in his hands, ran to the goal post, put the ball down, kicked it in and proudly exclaimed that he was first !

Sin-cerely Sinbad - Mere Yaaron Sunlo Sunlo

2010-07-08T11:42:00.000-07:00

Tagged by Momo's Ma and Ambulisamma to list ten gender-stereotype-defying things about the self

Its been rather entertaining to read everyone's response to this Tag - thanks much to IHM for starting this !

Here's my list:
1) Addicted to Sci-Fi and Fantasy fiction/series/movies
2) Passionate sports watcher - Have intimidated many guys in college during cricket related arguments. Obsessive obscure factoid rememberer (memorized the entire "A" section of the Oxford Atlas for gaining the edge in Geography word building contests)
3) The way to my heart is through my stomach.
         Feed me once, I'll say you are nice
         Feed me twice, I am yours for life
4) My eyes glaze over when folks talk about Jewelry/Gold etc. The only time I will be interested in precious metals is if someone discovers a way to convert them into Chocolate
5) The term "Essential Accessories", to me, implies - Wireless mouse, Ethernet cables, Car charger, USB Adapter. Consider that the world will be a better place if the only available bags were backpacks and the only allowed footwear were sneakers and flats. Guaranteed to topple over if asked to wear one-inch-heels
6) When I see the cosmetics section in a store, I run in the opposite direction. Preferably towards the Food Court
7) Do not like mushy chick flicks. Didn't have a crush on Aamir/Salman/Tom Cruise. Relished Kill Bill v 1 & 2. Consider Judwaa and AAA to be Sallu's best movies.  Adore Govinda's madcap capers, Ravi Teja masala-fests, vintage Amitabh dialogues
8) Would like to ban soft-rock by Lionel Ritchie, Michael Bolton, Bryan Adams or any of the Boy Bands. Love Deep Purple, Nirvana, Smashing Pumpkins and Rush.
9) Can swear like a sailor in several languages (not including Klingon). The spouse has had to use Sama/Dana/Bheda/Danda techniques to get me to stop
10) Will prefer to go for a root canal than go shopping. Believe in the "Wham, Bam, Thank you salesperson" approach to shopping. Proud of the fact that I completed an Ikea shopping trip in twenty minutes flat

On the flip side

- Love to cook and bake
- Been frequently derided as being OCD about cleanliness. The mater acerbically remarked once that if I had only ten minutes to live, I'd rush to clean the dishes and ensure an empty kitchen sink
- Not into hardy outdoor activities or adventure sports
- Don't like to drive much

I request KS to do this tag in the comments. Every blogger I know has been tagged already

Sur Naa Saje, Kya Gaaoon Main

2010-07-08T00:04:00.000-07:00

What a difference a week makes !

The first to bolt was the bridegroom
Then the best man left the room
Should the bride just swoon
Or settle for the least offensive goon ?

At least I wasn't around to see the massacre firsthand. Only heard bits and pieces about each successive battle lost. Now am back and feel the increasingly bitter taste of unpalatable reality.

Of all the teams one would have hoped to see in the final game of FIFA'10 - I'd never have voted for Robben and Co. The boring, mechanical, flairless, by-the-book-to-the-power-of-infinity, undeserving, unappealing, unbearable, Mojo-less Dutch !! Excuse me while I swallow the rising bile in my throat and regain my breath after gasping in horror like a gagging goldfish

The only silver lining to this ever-darkening cloud is that the Germans didn't make it.

Uruguay - Well done ! Forlan, but not forlorn. Hope you beat the Germans and somewhat restore the pride of the South American fans !

Spain - Muchas Gracias for preventing the horror of a Deutsche vs Dutch clash for the cup. I forgive your pathetic display against the Swiss and other sundry indiscretions thus far. Please stay true to your attacking style and make a Hollandaise Salsa out of your opponents

Torres & Villa, Forlan & Suarez - I can't say it better than what the great MSV has done. So all I'll do is quote from one of his everlasting creations

Appaavum thathavum vanthaargaL pOnaargaL
Thappenna seyya nee eppOthum viLaiyaadu
Appaavi enbaargaL thapaaga ninaikkaathE
Eppadhai pOnaalum inbathai thaLLaathE

Samba Siva Samba !

One Two Ka Four

2010-06-29T14:41:00.000-07:00

The quarter final lineup is complete - The Spaniards edging out their Iberian brethren in the most evenly matched second round game

Here are my predictions on the four QF matches

The games are ordered sequentially based on the semi final pairings - Winner of #1 will meet the winner of #2. Winner of #3 will meet the winner of #4

1) Argentina vs Germany: Will be very interesting to see how this unfolds. The Argentine defense is nothing to write home about. All the Germans need are a few soaring kicks - either from the German Goalie or due to fumbles by the Argentine forwards - reaching the surefooted Ozil or Klose patrolling the midfield - with Muller and Podolski getting up close and personal with the Argentine goalie right on cue. Game over for Maradona's Manos. Of course the Messi-Tevez Tango will keep things interesting at the other end too.

Prediction: First half will be very closely fought. Germany will lead 1-0 at halftime.
Final score: 2-1. Winner: Germany.

Maradona will finally take off his suit jacket and get into fisticuffs with the referees

2) Paraguay vs Spain: Paraguay didn't have to do much in the first or second rounds to get to this point. This will be their first real test. Their offence will fail spectacularly and their defence will be no match for the deadly duo of Villa and Torres

Prediction: The Spaniards will lead 2-0 at halftime. Paraguay will be beaten on all counts in the second half.
Final score: 3-1. Winner: Spain

Note: No matter who wins this game, they will lose in the semi final to the winner of match #1

3) Uruguay vs Ghana: Haven't really followed Ghana much. Since the US gave Ghana such a tough fight, I can safely say that Uruguay will not have too much trouble with the last African team at this tournament. The Forlan-Suarez combo is formidable enough to break through any defensive lineup.

Prediction: First half will be goalless. The Uruguayan offense will prevail in the second half.
Final score: 2-0. Winner: Uruguay.

4) Netherlands vs (The team that must not be named)

Am fine with any sort of on-field play - a dull, sleep-inducing defensive game, a zero score draw, a goalless & soulless extra-time performance, everything being decided by a penalty shootout - whatever - no complaints from me

No predictions, no reading tarot cards, the mind's a complete void on this one, free of thought. Only prayers to higher authorities to kindly oblige and do the needful.

Ummachi, please make sure that the Dutch team loses or Netherlands gets eliminated - am fine either way

The reason why Raavan(an) flopped

2010-06-29T00:02:00.000-07:00

It struck a discordant note with the existing theme of Mile Asur Mera Tumhara

Scary scenes

2010-06-28T11:10:00.000-07:00

Would it be very Ruud to say that Gullit the commentator is totally dull, slow and boring ? In short - the antithesis of his former football-playing self.

First the shocking sight of a seal-like Maradona in a suit - looking (to paraphrase PGW) as if suits were being built tight around the torso this season

Now Gullit's all gussied-up, showing the unflattering impact of too much partying and copious consumption of fine spirits

What next - Gazza singing at the FIFA'10 closing ceremony ? The mind shudders, the heart trembles and the hand itches to throw the TV Remote away

Post Haste

2010-06-28T10:11:00.000-07:00

Scene: Morning we-should-have-been-ready-10-minutes-ago rush on a weekday

Bunnu: Amma, you aren't smiling. Let me do some funny trick
Me: Sure
Bunnu: Let me write something for you. Yeah, I'll write some blog
Me: Wha ?!
Bunnu: How do I write blog ?
The Spouse (rolling his eyes at me): Did you hear what he said ? As if having one blog-obsessed person wasn't enough, now I have two to deal with

Jhoom Biradar Jhoom

2010-06-27T05:00:00.000-07:00

As expected, Uruguay beat South Korea and Ghana beat the US, in the initial second round matches

Señor Forlan and Señor Suarez - no matter how many paeans are sung in praise of your Borg-style hive mindset, they will not suffice. Here is my humble effort:

Dhaage Tod Laaoon Chandni Se Noor Ke
Goal post par laga doon, Net banaakar door se
Defenders foul karen toh, Referee Se Kahdo
Penalty Kick Har Ek Baar, Dete Rahe Tumko

Goal Na Halke Halke, Goal Na Halke Halke
Paoon Se Halke Halke, Goal Na Halke

Sign #25124 that trains rule our lives

2010-06-26T09:37:00.000-07:00

The Spouse enters the house one evening.

Bunnu promptly exclaims - Appa has just puffed in !

Groups G & H - Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak

2010-06-25T11:15:00.000-07:00

FIFA - what were you thinking ?? My favorite teams are going to face each other in Round 2 - for no fault of theirs. As Dev Anand sang in Hum Dono:

Kabhi Khud Pe
Kabhi Haalaat Pe
Rona Aaya
Baat Nikli Toh
Har Ek Baat Pe Rona Aaya

Brazil and Portugal qualified from Group G. Chile and Spain should qualify from Group H.

This will lead to the following second round match ups:

Scenario 1: Brazil- Spain, Portugal - Chile

Brazil vs Spain - Ay Caramba ! In my mind, this will be the final game of FIFA'10 - what happens afterwards is meaningless. O Door Ke Musafir, Humko Bhi Saath Le Le Re, Hum Rah Gaye Akele

Portugal vs Chile: A classic case of Goliath vs David - the ultimate defense machine against an inexperienced, dazzling offense. The head knows that Portugal will win. But the heart beats for Chile. Mann Re Tu Kaahe Na Dheer Dhare

Scenario 2: Brazil- Chile, Portugal - Spain

Brazil vs Chile: Why, why, why ? The day the music stops. Fans lose, no matter what happens. Rulake Gaya Sapna Mera

Portugal vs Spain - The ultimate bullfight. Will the defensive matador win ? Or will the bull live up to its fearsome reputation ? The game will surely be scintillating - the fans will win irrespective of the outcome - Bahut Shukriya Badi Meherbaani

Final words to Group G and H qualifiers (Sorry Kurt for borrowing your everlasting words)

Come as you are, as you were, as I want you to be.
As a friend, as a friend, as an old Enemy
Take your time, hurry up, choice is yours, don't be late.
Take a rest, as a friend, as an old memory.

Aside: The Chile team is living upto its country's name and is on fire. The Uruguayans are living up to the adage "You go Uruguay, I'll go mine" when they face any opponent. Chile and Uruguay are playing true South American football - attacking, lively, lightning fast, a ballet unfolding on the field, not a dull moment anywhere, a treat for fans of the game. This more than compensates for the lopsided defensive tactics of Dunga's Brazilians and the mechanical aggressiveness of Maradona's Argentinos.

Dear Chile and Uruguay teams - No matter what happens - Chellam, I Love You Da !

Update: Its going to be Scenario 2
Sighhhhhh .......
Hazaaron Khwahishen Aisii Ki Har Khwahish Pe Dum Nikle
Bahut Nikle Mere Armaan Lekin Phir Bhi Kum Nikle

Addio Azzuri

2010-06-24T13:43:00.000-07:00

For the first time in 34 years, The Italians are out before the second round

Italy Hokar Girne Se
Samjhi Humne Gravity
Slovakia ka match dekha
Tab Ayi Kilarity

Na Koi Hasne Wala
Na Koi Dekhne Wala

Bandh Huyi Paathshaala
Lippi Ki Paathshaala

Baap Numbri Beta Dus Numbri

2010-06-24T10:52:00.000-07:00

Scene 1: Bunnu and I are reading The Rooster and The Sun. The spouse is lounging nearby.

We are at the point in the narrative where the Sun has gone AWOL and the world is plunged into darkness

I read aloud the sentence in the book which says "Several days had passed by".

The Spouse: That's not right. It doesn't make any sense
Me: Am just reading from the book ! What's wrong ?
The Spouse: If the Sun has gone away, how can even a single "day" pass ? Days are defined by the rising of the Sun
Me: Tulika Publishers, we have a problem !

Scene 2: Bunnu wakes up on a sunny morning and promptly turns on all the lights

Me: Switch them off. We turn on the lamps only in the evening
Bunnu: But I want the room to be lighter

Scene 3: Bunnu's playing with his toys.

Bunnu: Amma, there are only two things that are real in this world
Me: What are those ? (Trying to be calm while panicking that he's already talking about such things)
Bunnu: Trains and Cars

That that person, that that priority

Colonial Cujjins

2010-06-23T12:21:00.000-07:00

Something about the way you played
I may never know the reason why you stayed
Sa Ni Da Pa Ma Ga Ma Ga Ri Sa

Second round match ups for Group C and Group D qualifiers:

All depends on who qualifies from Group D and in which order

US vs [Ghana | Germany | Serbia]
England vs [Ghana | Germany | Serbia]

Confusion hi Confusion Hai

2010-06-22T11:19:00.000-07:00

Who will qualify from Group C ? Based on the current standings, anything's possible

The Brits will play spoilsport to at least one team - a clear case of Thaan Kettadhum Illamal Chandrapushkaraniyum Sethu Keduthaan
The Slovenians depend on the mercies of at least one of the other three teams. Theme song: Naan Paadum Sandham Vaarthai Un Sondham
The Americans will howl about unfair treatment (by the referee, the other teams, Nelson Mandela) no matter what happens. The US coach's prayer: Aadungada Machan Aadungada
The Algerians have an off-chance of qualifying and are probably OK with any result - Engeyum Eppodhum Sangeetham Sandhosham

Look No Father

2010-06-19T23:45:00.000-07:00

Its Father's Day. The haves celebrate the presence while the have-nots mourn the absence

Birth and death can both be viewed as prisms. The arrival of a young 'un alters the dull white of daily routine into a rainbow of joy. Death refracts the light of life irrevocably into directions unknown

Appa. The eternal optimist. Firm believer that there is some good in everyone. Unwavering anchor. The sunshine to disperse even the darkest of clouds

How you delighted in seeing Bunnu's photos and videos. The happiness you felt on hearing him gurgle over the phone as you sang to him from afar. We were so sure, you and I, that you'd meet Bunnu for certain, it was just a matter of time and logistics.

Kim Aashcharyam, the Yaksha seemed to mockingly question. The hammer blow impact of Dharma's answer hit me unerringly in one vulnerable moment

In an instant, all our hopes and dreams were dealt a fatal blow. All newly-redundant dreams do not mercifully get annihilated together. Each dream shatters in its own time, with the associated pain of remembrance, like individual arcs of fading colours in the aftermath of a fireworks display

The acid of the words congealed into the ears, the mind reeling in disbelief. Time seemed to stand still, as I hid in the comfort zone of memories past - the last conversation, the last verbal hug, the last time I heard you laugh.

Trayambakam Yajamahe Sugandhim Pushtivardhanam, the heart chanted in a rebellious frenzy for days on end, unwilling to let go of the hope that the miracle of the Mrityunjaya Mantram would somehow bring you back.

It was the little things that caught me unprepared. The way my voice shook as I dictated your name with the "Late" prefix to a typist in a government office. The misery of finding everything at home to be the same as before, including your shaving cream tossed on the counter, the lid not quite tightened, as always. The ten-seconds-too-late realization that you were gone when I woke in the mornings feeling that all was normal.

Those who are left behind don't bear any obvious marks. Only invisible brushstrokes of grief over the scarred landscape of the soul. Changed forever, in ways that cannot be undone

Appa, I say this not just to you, but to all those paters who have been pitilessly prodded into past tense by the grim reaper

Our paths converged for a while, a fortune of fate
The privilege and pleasure was ours, the realization of brevity too late
Though you might be out of our sense or sight
May all your paths be flooded with light
Though we shall always feel that something's amiss
May all your journeys lead you to bliss

Tamizh Dialogues Quiz 2 - The Answers

2010-06-18T11:18:00.000-07:00

Thanks to everyone who commented on this quiz. Here are the answers:

1.Aana idhellam nadandhudumo nu bayama irukku

Alaipayuthey. Madhavan's dare to Shalini - perhaps the male equivalent of Girija's "Odippolama" dare to Nag in Idayathai Thirudadhe

2.Naan avana madhiri thola pathi ellam kavalai padala. Enakkunnu oru aala pathi thaan kavalai padaren

Aan Paavam. Pandian and Pandiarajan play beleagured sons to V.K.Ramaswamy. When VKR focuses on marriage proposals for Pandian, this line is bemoaningly uttered by Pandiarajan to his grandma

3.Innikki settha naalaiku paal

Pudhu Pudhu Arthangal. Punch line from Vivek before he became a "Comedy Thilakam"

4.Adingadaa, panathaala adingadaa

Duet. Prakash Raj's memorable line suggesting ways to separate the joined-at-the-hip musical-duo-cum-brothers Prabhu and Ramesh Arvind

5.Thambi Ramakrishnan, koochapadaamal matravargalukkum padithu kaattavum

Kozhi Koovudhu. The line which precedes the "Poove Ilaya Poove" song

6.Naan engirundhu pesarena ? Phone kitterundhu pesaren

Pattinathil Boodham. Nagesh gets rattled on seeing Jeeboomba and rushes to the telephone to call the police. When the policeman asks him where he's speaking from, he utters this line

7.Adhukku thaan enna madhiri chiricha mugama irukkanum da. Appo dhaan padivaaluga

Subramaniapuram. The violent ways of Azhagar and Paraman and the sinister machinations of Kasi are nicely offset by the comically innocent ways of Dopa and Dumka. This line is uttered by a hobbling Dumka to the rest of the gang in the tea kadai as Paraman rues his ill-luck with women

8.Vara vara un value koranjitte irukku. Settha neeye poi sudukatla paduthukanum

Ullathai Allitha. Manivannan in a double role as twins - one a Madras Bhai and another a millionaire. The gangster utters this line to his kidnapped twin while his ransom terms are negotiated with a miserly Karthik

9.Arisiyum Kadugum aagaasathulaya velayudhu ? Mannula dhaane velayum

Irumbuthirai. The shopkeeper uses this line to justify the presence of stones in foodgrains and mustard seeds to his irate customers

10.Nee paamba thinniya appana thinniya ?

Adutha Varisu. The memorable exchange between Cho and an Eliza Dolittle-wannabe Sridevi as he serves her food and she gustily devours everything being placed on her plate (a la Obelix). This line is uttered by Cho as she rattles on about her father and about eating snakes in the same breath, while an I'm-not-'enry 'iggins Rajini looks on

Sacrebleu Les Bleus

2010-06-17T19:51:00.000-07:00

I know for sure that you and I ain't no Salim-Sahibjaan
But I say this on behalf of every French football fan

Aaj Hum Apni
Duaaon Ka Asar Dekhenge
Teer-E-Nazar Dekhenge
Zakhm-E-Jigar Dekhenge

Hope you qualify by some miracle and reach the next round !

Ajab Forlan Ki Ghazab Kahani

2010-06-17T09:37:00.000-07:00

Dear Bafana Bafana

Its OK to lose to a better team. But some things (outlined below) are not OK:

The SA Defenders: You are not playing kabaddi. Enough of the jersey-pulling and shoving !
The SA Forwards: Stop looking plaintively at the referee for everything. Or are you trying to imitate your initial-sake Shahid Afridi, the way he'd look at the umpires ?
The SA Goalie: Khune Chala. Lahoo Ke Do Rang is all fine and dandy, but a red card has only one colour
The SA Fans: No matter what happens, you should not walk out before the match is done. Please get inspired by the Samba fans who sat through the 0-3 loss to France in the 1998 Final

Uruguay Fans' Old Lament:
Woh Bhooli Daastaan
Jo Phir Yaad Aa Gayi

Uruguay Fans' Current Jingle:
Khelo Khelo
Khelo Ji Sanam Hum Aa Gaye
Aaj Phir Dil Leke

Tora Tora Torres

2010-06-16T10:12:00.000-07:00

The first burnt tortilla of FIFA'10 has been served

The Swiss were true to stereotype: Dour, clinical, precise, bankable

The Spaniards were true to stereotype as well: Flamboyant, agile, hot headed, chaotic

The Swiss made full use of the very few chances they got and scored the only goal of the match. The Spaniards controlled the ball, dominated the midfield, had numerous chances to score - but failed due to poor finishing and a complete lack of coordinated play among their forwards

Unless the Spanish offense quickly changes its Bull in a China shop persona and transforms into a team of tactical Toreadors, it will become very clear as to why there is a "Mad" in Madrid and a "Real Mad" in Real Madrid

Tamizh Film Dialogues Quiz - 2

2010-06-15T14:59:00.000-07:00

Guess the Tamizh films that the following dialogues are from:

Aana idhellam nadandhudumo nu bayama irukku
Naan avana madhiri thola pathi ellam kavalai padala. Enakkunnu oru aala pathi thaan kavalai padaren
Innikki settha naalaiku paal
Adingadaa, panathaala adingadaa
Thambi Ramakrishnan, koochapadaamal matravargalukkum padithu kaattavum
Naan engirundhu pesarena ? Phone kitterundhu pesaren
Adhukku thaan enna madhiri chiricha mugama irukkanum da. Appo dhaan padivaaluga
Vara vara un value koranjitte irukku. Settha neeye poi sudukatla paduthukanum
Arisiyum Kadugum aagaasathulaya velayudhu ? Mannula dhaane velayum
Nee paamba thinniya appana thinniya ?

The sum of all prayers

2010-06-15T10:15:00.000-07:00

Ummachi

To you I pray
As they go on-field today

Let PRK be the first of many rivals to be vanquished
A sumptuous feast of dazzling goals sating the famished
Hope they do not become toast
To the machinations of Ivory Coast
When they play Portugal, the old colonists
Let there be no lingering loyalties, no misplaced pacifists

Their play can be scrappy at times
Losing their rhythm in tempestuous climes

Some of their stars tend to be egoistic
But their moves are usually fantastic

No matter what happens, do prevent
The Samba drums from going silent

Lovers of by-the-book methods may disagree, but still
Please do ensure that the winner is always Brazil

FIFA'10: Gabbar Main Aa Raha Hoon

2010-06-13T10:27:00.000-07:00

With the above line did Dharam Paaji's Veeru throw down the gauntlet at the dreaded dacoit Gabbar Singh in Sholay

Sports is one arena where a greenhorn oft-challenges an incumbent.

Some records appear to be unbreakable - but never say never - sometimes a contender arises to potentially usurp even the most secure of thrones.

Exhibit A: The English goalkeeper Robert Green's ultimate butterfingers error that literally handed a goal to the US in yesterday's World Cup match. Guess he was too green around the gills to handle the pressure ?

This fumble shows Green's willingness and dedication to the Holy Grail of Goalkeeping - the ultimate World Cup blunder by a goalie.

This mantle has rested for two decades with the legendary Rene Higuita of Colombia, who was called El Loco by fans and foes alike

The Colombian worked very hard to achieve this honour in the 1990 world cup match at Naples between Colombia and Cameroon. The second of two goals that he gave away in as many minutes truly earned Higuita his moment of fame.

Thanks to the person who put this clip on Youtube. The main action is between 00:50 and 1:04 in the video. Higuita takes a leisurely stroll to the midfield, unmindful of Roger Milla circling close by, and eventually pays a very heavy price for his actions. There is no doubt left in any viewer's mind that this goalkeeper was one of a kind

Until now that is. I have serious misgivings if Higuita will keep his throne - or will be made to turn green with envy

Question of the Day

2010-06-13T10:21:00.001-07:00

Argentina's current Number.10 jersey-wearer is an interesting case of international integration.

He is Italian by ancestry, but plays for Argentina

If Argentina play the Azzuri in this World Cup, will it be a case of truly Messi loyalties ?